I guess we should start with why I chose the Race. To be honest doing a missionary type thing in any context was the farthest thing from my mind. I mean my mind runs through lists of reasons why and why not. Money, leaving people I love, leaving things i love doing, giving up my rights, leaving work, leaving my comfort zones, i have bills to pay, things im responsible…and the list goes on and on. So what changed? I stopped fighting. I let my walls down with God and of course He came walking in. He began opening my eyes to things. Surrounding me with people who were/are praying crazy prayers for me. I realize that in terms of the Kingdom my reasons for not going are meaningless. My reasons are small and are no match for God to take care of. So life continues and I realize my heart is changing. Oh man, give me something new! And so even though the here and now is good…real good, He’s calling me to something greater. I wish i knew what but the funny thing about being a disciple is God sometimes doesnt give us the straight forward. This leaves things up in the air and unsure. But our faith is active as the book of James tells us. There’s a doing aspect to it, its not always sit and listen and recieve. Somehow theres a balance of the two. So yeah, God has put new desires in my heart; things im begining to become aware of and things i will become aware of. As I step more fully into who God has called me to be and really believe it…i mean really believe it; i see the shifts in my world and i see God aligning things to pave the way. I don’t know what to expect. I know itll be great. I know ill be broken. i know ill cry a lot and be exposed a lot. I know people will be healed and will know who they are loved by. So though i chose this life as a disciple years ago; its evident this part is choosing me…
Til next time…
