Dear G-Squad,
Thank you for loving me when I made it hard to choose love. Thank you for the ways in which you reached out to me this year to have God teach me things through you that you might not even know.
I want you to know I seriously do not want to go home early…
My desire is to be here with you finishing this race well and carrying out the things God put on my heart for the final three months.
However, I have a shoulder injury that keeps getting worse rather than better and trying to do the Camino with it would only wreck it further.
There’s also the fact I’m not fully funded.
I’ve prayed into what seems like a difficult decision either way…
Go home laying down desires to finish or continue knowing my shoulder health would suffer
Therefore this is my bittersweet goodbye.
I want you to know how much I believe in each and everyone of you
How grateful I am to have journeyed with you this far
How cool it is to see the growth that has already occurred in each of you for none of you are the same men and women who started this race
How excited I am to see how God uses you in these last 3 months as you finish well
At training camp, I felt like I might not belong to this group of people because I was the only one who failed the fitness test. Even with you cheering me on at the end, it wasn’t enough to beat the time allotted. So I had to retry the next day with some great coaching and an even more awesome cheerleading from you all. I still remember the group embrace at the top of the hill at the finish ::priceless:: yet I was still too slow. I thought I might not get to experience this year with you until an opportunity to try once more at launch was provided. I PASSED! and in doing so proved to myself I could do it.
Fast forward to different times on the race where physical challenges came up and I started to wonder about should I really be here with you all. It got hard and honestly I placed too much focus on the physical which in turn affected the emotional. It kept me from being able to fully enjoy all God had for me though He taught me a lot through you all on how to love myself where I am at in my journey. Funny how now as I prepare to leave the race is when I finally feel like you are my people and I belong. I honestly don’t want to leave you yet.
You twenty somethings remind me of what it looks like to be passionate and to simply have fun along the way. Most of you are far more mature than your years which is a testament to God’s work in your life. Thank you for all your moments of humor and reminding me to take things less seriously. I know you are going to change the world in ways only your generation can. God is going to move powerfully through you especially if you take what you have learned this year and go even deeper in relationship with Him as you grow in your faith.
My fellow 30s club members kept me sane as we shared the wisdom we’ve gleaned over the years. I appreciate your perspectives too in a more endearing way. Discipleship is key!
Shout out to Dauntless, Team Two, Fellowship of the King, and Almost Heaven for your love and support as we shared life together in more intimate ways than all squad weeks allowed. There are so many wonderful people on this squad and not enough time to fully get to know you all but I am thankful for the time we had.
I will carry each and every one of you in my heart as I journey on for all of you contributed something to enrich my life this year. We all learned how important communication and feedback are in relating to one another and your words were taken to heart. I stand with you in prayer as you finish your race.
I may be going home but know I will still be an active squadmate by being an intercessor for you as you go to Turkey, hike the Camino in Spain, and finish the race in Morocco. I look forward to experiencing these places through your blogs and photos.
Press into the Lord as you go boldy into these places. Give it your all these last three months. Share Jesus with no fear of man. Be obedient.
Finish well and think about how you will return home in a few short weeks changed by all that has happened this year. Think about how you will continue living out those learned experiences back at home. ATL should be everyday as effortless as a conversation with your best friend. I know some of you may struggle with finding community as authentic as what we have shared this last year but I know if you can’t find it, you’ll create it.
Be ready to go forth and live those dreams you have dreamed BIG over this last year with God even if you’re not quite sure of the first step. He only asks that you take one step of faith at a time and to trust Him in the process.
I love you all very much and want you to know you can count on me to continue praying for you and if you ever need a friend back in the States. I may be leaving the World Race early but the race God sets before each of us continues on long after this training ground has been left.
Above all else remember how much God loves you and let His love overflow into the lives of everyone you meet.
Sincerely,
Nicole
