As I travel on this journey, there are things which come up that bother me. Most people think actions are the issue when it’s really the principle behind the actions I am concerned with as I sit and try to think of how I can be the change I wish to see. For example, I do not mind someone borrowing my stuff to use but I would like to be asked first rather than someone just taking things without asking. Therefore, it’s not my stuff being taken (the action) which bothers me but the lack of consideration (principle) in them not asking. Yes I also realize that nothing is truly mine- I am only being allowed to steward those things but that’s another story 🙂
I observe people and often there are moments where I see the principle operating or the bigger picture and it breaks my heart. When I try to communicate what I see, I keep realizing there are many issues at hand- the action, the reasoning behind the action, the principle at play, the perception(s) of action, and quite often deeper issues being discovered.
One common thing I am noticing is COMPARISON. Comparison is a thief of joy because it fosters competition more than community.
For me, I can easily celebrate the diversity among my group and even those we meet along the way. I can encourage them in their giftings and simply be excited for who they are in Christ without comparing myself to them. Yet where I do compare is how far along in the journey I am to them and vice versa. You see there are deep desires of my heart I long for and have been praying for many years now. When G-d seems to give others what they have been longing for while I still wait- talk about a gut punch. I try not to be angry at G-d in those moments even though those are the ones when He and I argue with one another. When I see others who possess kingdom character aspects and whose intimacy level with the LORD seems to be deeper, that’s when envy comes in the form of comparison and it is so sneaky. Comparison is corrosive. It eats away at my ability to be content and confident. It is a poison that kills the love I have for myself.
12 Of course, we wouldn’t dare to put ourselves in the same class or compare ourselves with those who rate themselves so highly. They compare themselves to one anothera]”>[a] and make up their own standards to measure themselves by, and then they judge themselves by their own standards. What self-delusion!
2 Corinthians 10:12 The Aramaic can be translated “copying one another.” God has made each of us unique and given us spiritual gifts that are unique. It is never wise to copy or compare yourself to another believer. Pride will result if we see ourselves as better than someone else, or discouragement if we see ourselves as less valuable than someone else. We don’t live by comparison to others but by Christ’s life in us.
4 So let each of you scrutinize his own actions. Then if you do find something to boast about, at least the boasting will be based on what you have actually done and not merely on a judgment that you are better than someone else; 5 for each person will carry his own load. (Gal 6:4-5)
The question becomes how do I love myself where I am at, right where you have me LORD, even though I know we both desire something better. When I tend to focus too much on what’s unlovable about me, what I need to change, grow in, or what could be better, or beat myself up for the mistakes I make, G-d whispers a reminder of how He wants me to be who He has made me to be. G-d loves me for who I am right now in this moment. It doesn’t matter what I’ve done in the past. I give that up and over to Him. He loves me unconditionally. There’s no prerequisite to His love. I am His daughter. In that there is JOY everlasting.
Moving forward I want others to see and experience G-d’s love for them too. There are a lot more facets to G-d than merely love, but I believe LOVE to be the core of who He is and how He operates.
