I’ve been trying, for a week now, to put my experiences at training camp into words and I’m still unable to form coherent sentences to explain what 10 days in the middle of the woods in Gainesville Georgia has done to me, so please bare with me as I try my best to explain to you what training camp did for me.
I’ve always had a relatively easy time making friends, I’m extremely outgoing and would probably talk to a wall if it would communicate back, but there’s something about meeting a group of 48 people who know nothing about you except your Facebook profile and the picture you’ve loaded to your blog that can be freeing and scary at the same time. Growing up everyone always knew who everyone was in my, not so little, home town, including EVERYTHING you had done in the past, so coming into the race I was pretty nervous to meet the people I would be spending the next year of my life with:
What if they didn’t like me?! What if I was too loud, too silly, too crazy for them?! (All things I had previously been told about myself) But even more scary is, what If I didn’t click with any of them?!
The ride to training camp I was an anxious mess but just two short days into training camp, I was writing in my journal how I was so afraid to leave training camp, to leave my new friends, my new sanctuary and safe zone, my new family and head back to “old Nicole’s” life for 6 weeks before launch. And it wasn’t because I didn’t miss my friends and family back home, because I did, but because the community I was able to find in those 48 strangers was unlike anything I had ever experienced in my 24 years to date.
These strangers poured into me, prayed over me and just whole-heartedly love me for who I am. They helped me find home in the middle of the woods in Georgia:
People keep asking me to talk about training camp and I keep talking about the people because that’s the easy part to talk about, what I actually experienced there is a lot harder to wrap my head around.
Complete strangers became family. There’s a new level of joy and freedom after camp. Life back home seems A LOT harder than it did before, but not because home has changed, home is exactly the same, but I’ve changed, and I’ve done so DRASTICALLY. Community looks different after being surrounded by such God fearing and loving people for 10 straight days. I didn’t wear makeup for 10 days, didn’t do my hair, look in a mirror or care what I was wearing, yet, for the first time in my life I felt truly beautiful and it had nothing to do with outward appearance like the world makes us think is so important.
People came up to me after hearing about my journey and my past transgressions and told me I was STRONG, I was COURAGEOUS, I was the CONDFIDENT woman they looked up to and finally I wasn’t the mistakes I had made; I wasn’t “Miley” I wasn’t the drunk girl or the slut; I was a beautiful worthy daughter of the most high King and I actually agreed with that title for the first time in my life. And man, let me tell you THAT IS AN INCREDIBLE FEELING.
I didn’t want to leave camp at the end of those 10 days & I want September 5th to be here sooner than it will be. I will miss my friends and family at home more than words can say but I know my new family will carry me when I think I can’t go anymore, they will bring joy into my life when I don’t think I can smile and they will love me when I don’t deserve to be loved and that community is something to look forward to being with for a year! I cannot begin to describe how thrilled I am to continue this crazy journey with God over the next year, I know the plans he has for me are far greater than I can imagine and I am SO excited to continue letting the woman he has planned for me to be all along grow and to thrive in his glorious love.
Launch is 44 days away and I’m just under 50% funded as of now!!! I can’t say thank you enough to those of you who have helped me get this far in my journey and I’m so thrilled to continue showing you how God is going to work through me with your help for the next year!
If you would like to help me continue on this journey please consider clicking the “support me” tab over to the left, otherwise please be praying for a safe journey for my Squad and me!!
My first stop will be in Novi Sad, Serbia where I’ll be working with youth in a heroin rehabilitation clinic alongside these 5 other beautiful women:
(Me,Faith,Anna, Shrena, Kayla & [yes they did put us on the same team] the other Nicole)
All the Love and Hugs,
Nicole
