I knew when I first signed up for World Race, I had to do something I don’t particularly like doing. It was inevitable. $16,000-$20,000 is a lot of money to raise by yourself. I had to undergo the process of fundraising, i.e. ask people for something that I don’t have, and asking people for money. I apologize in advance if this seems brief because although I feel uncomfortable sharing this, I feel like this is another way God is trying to crack open my rarely-opened box of emotions before the trip and allow for some growth.
I’ve grown up virtually completely independent. I got my first job at 15 and have been holding steady jobs ever since then. I’ve worked hard to get where I am. Unlike some kids, I paid for my initial driving tests, my first car (which I’m still rolling in to this day. Good ol’ Donny-T!), gas, tuition, etc. There have been days upon days where I’ve worked back-to-back to-back-to-back double shifts from 8am-midnight just so that I could afford living on my own. I’ve had to sacrifice going to the beach and hanging out with friends just so that I could work and make money. I say all of this not to boast in my work ethic, I say this to raise a very important issue in my life that people like you need to know. Because I tend to provide for myself more often than not, I take pride in not taking anything from anyone else. This isn’t just a well-earned sense of pride, it’s an actual “I don’t need anything from anyone ever because I know I can work my tail off to provide for myself” kind of pride.
So I’ve done what every other person with this outlook on life has done. I saw the final number that I needed to raise and set to it. I figured that $16,000-$20,000 are large numbers, yes, but I could find a way to raise it on my own. I right away began to search for jobs while I began my second semester in my Senior year here at SWU. I applied and applied to a countless number of places, but I couldn’t find a job anywhere. I ended up settling (although I wouldn’t really call it that because the job is so fulfilling) with a job in the Admissions department here at SWU where I would work anywhere from 8-16 hours a week. You can imagine the difference between working 90 hours a week last year to this year working only 8-16. I thought to myself that since I couldn’t find a job that I could get some serious hours at, I would find other ways to make money. So what did I do?
Pawn Stars has this addictive nature about it that makes you believe that you can find anything you own and sell it for a huge profit. So that’s what I tried to begin to do. I looked through all of my memorabilia, antiques, old toys, anything that I could potentially put up for sale on eBay or Amazon that would attract potential buyers. Needless to say, I live in SC and most of my personal items are in MI, so I didn’t really have a wide range of variety to choose from. I don’t think anyone really cares about a sweet pair of used socks I wore when I ran my long run last week, because that’s pretty much the extent of the items I have brought with me down to SC. I do, however, have one possession that is worth some value and that is my road bike. I have tried selling it many times on Craigslist, Local Bike Trader, eBay, you name it, but I’ve always ended up with the same result of no buyers.
Well since I don’t work often and don’t really have anything I can sell, I began asking all the people I know down here if they need any extra work done around the house or at school so that I could help with. I have had a few takers, but not as much as I expected I would.
So I moved on to what I thought would be my last resort. Many of my squad mates have began different sets of fundraisers in terms of selling personal items, whether it’s selling shirts, bracelets, or stickers. This sounds like a great way to make a little bit of money, but like all fundraisers, it requires an initial set up cost and an audience in which you can sell to. Many of my squad mates attend college at institutions well over 2,000 students or live in a heavily populated area, so they have no problem finding people they can sell to. I attend school at a very small school in a town that resembles that of Sparta, MI in regards to geographical size (If you don’t know how big it is or what it looks like, Google it. I’m sure you could find something!). My return on investment would be relatively low, given that my initial set up costs may in fact be greater than revenue I would receive on my small amount of sales.
So that’s where I stood as of a few weeks ago and to be quite honest, that is where I stand now. It’s taken me a few weeks to put this into words so that is why I haven’t posted in a while. Fundraising has indeed become an obstacle I thought I could easily get over, and it has slowly began to break my sense of individualistic pride. For those who are close to me, you know just how little I ask of anybody for anything, so you know how hard it is for me to ask people for anything.
I am still battling with understanding that sometimes I can’t be in control of everything. I’m beginning to understand that I need to let God take over the reigns sometimes and allow for things to happen. It’s hard for Him to act though when I constantly try to pull him out of the driver’s seat. Sometimes it takes an act of God and God alone for things to happen.
I ask that you continue to pray for my spiritual transformation as well as my unease about this fundraising process. If you feel so willing to donate, I would be greatly appreciative. God’s got some crazy awesome plans for all of us that are involved. You could be a part of not only my transformation, but the transformation of those whom we reach. There is still a long ways to go in order for me to reach my goal, but any amount that you give would be of incredible help. I love each and every one of you guys. Again, I’m not very good at asking for anything, so I’m not quite sure how I feel about publicly doing this. I just know that your help would be genuinely appreciated and that I would be eternally grateful for any donation, regardless the amount.
Your brother and friend,
– N.J. Shear
