We all go a little crazy sometimes. I’m sure that those of us in “extreme conditions” (as Colby always puts it) are more prone to insanity than others. We are also more justified in doing so. Needless to say, after 10 months of community we have lived in some crazy, gross, hot, cold, exciting, and boring places. I have seen every member of my team go a little crazy at least once, and I have myself gone cuckoo more than I care to mention.
We have some great stories of the funny and dark side to this whole experience. Once in a crazed fit of anger Chelsea nearly beat Anthony to death for farting on her freshly washed pillow. Another time, she cried hysteric tears of joy over a piece of cake. I’ve seen Anthony talk for hours with himself, pretending that he was a sports commentator for the Buffalo Bills and then admit it all to me (when I had thought he was on Skype). Oh, and there was that one time he forgot where he was and farted on Chelsea’s pillow. Lacey once threw all her food on the ground and stomped away like a small child would because bees kept landing on it. Halley has ooh-ed, ahh-ed, and touched every disease-ridden animal we’ve seen across three continents.
And let’s not forget the ever famous “Creeper Stache Incident.” You remember.
AHH!! Still scares me.
I think that most of these were probably caused by stress or poor judgement, not mild cases of the crazies. Here in Cambodia, the heat is making us do things or think things, that are definitely crazy. Allow me to rant for a spell of things that have been going down in my brain and making me a little crazy.
We’ve got mad infestations here in Touch Village. Ants (you know I hate ants), flies, and geckos rule this place in high and underfed numbers. You can hardly go ten minutes without being bitten by ants, while eight flies try relentlessly to land on your face all while the hundred and fifty geckos chilling on the wall sing their rendition of “In The Jungle.” Did you know those tiny color changing lizards make noise? I didn’t. I had never heard a peep out of them until we came here. It could have something to do with the King Gecko being present. Maybe he’s making them sing? He is huge. It’d be like a 20 foot tall man telling you to sing. You’d do it, don’t lie. I can’t take him seriously though. Every time I see him I imagine him standing on two legs trying to sell me car insurance with a bad accent.
You may know me and my crazy head well enough to know that all this is normal. I can handle these little ADD rants and thoughts pretty well. Like I’ve said before, it’s part of who God made me. What I have started acting really crazy over is the flies. People who know me might say that I can take a lot without saying much or complaining, but I am really losing it over these flies. They’re my crazy button pushers. I keep finding myself daydreaming that I am some super awesome bioengineer scientist guy who creates a super awesome virus that kills every living fly on the earth. I wonder if it’s a sin to fantasize about the destruction of one of God’s creations…probably. I am really losing it over them though. I wonder if there is such a thing as circumstantial Tourette’s Syndrome. Probably not. I try to make myself feel better by saying that Satan has sent them to torment me and keep me from my siestas. So they totally deserve to be cursed at in an angry sounding whisper so no one can hear me. I doesn’t work. I hope I am a patient person when all of this is over.
So on to the story you have waited for my ADD brain to spit out for the last few blogs.
Like I said earlier, the heat makes us do things we would not do were we in our right minds. So no judging Colby as I tell you this story.
It was maybe our fifth day here, and Colby told me he could not sleep the night before. He said he had that paranoid feeling that ants were crawling around in his shorts and that it was so bad he had to go bathe. Now, I had the feeling he was leaving something out. It is my own experience, however, that you sometimes need to tell an embarrassing story a few times, adding in the harder to tell parts each time. So, I waited for it all to come out.
Then maybe two days later, while Dan and Brandy visited, the whole story was revealed. I cannot fully comprehend the why or how of such a crazy and dangerous course of action. The heat does weird things to a man. Somewhere in his crazed state of paranoia he decided that Raid was his best option. Now I wish I could say he did things differently from here, maybe that he sprayed all around the room and then changed all his clothes, but no. Colby went straight to the source of all his problems and sprayed the Raid down his boxers.
I then understood that the shower he mentioned to me was not to rid himself of the imaginary ants, but to stop the burning that ensues after large amounts of Raid touches one’s skin. (Exaggerated sigh) I also wish that was the end of the horrible ordeal for Colby, but no. Dan, being a great opportunist, proceeded to convince Colby that 20/20 and 60 Minutes had both shown specials titled “The Dangers of Raid” and “Raid Deformed My Children.” He had Colby convinced that if he was able to have children, they would likely have eight legs and horns. He nearly persuaded him to see the doctor about it, which we would have filmed, but instead mercifully ended his joke and ‘fessed up there.
For all of theses crazy moments, we are still sane most of the time…well, most of us. I’m probably more crazy than not.
Nick
