Written 11.16.10
Shoot. Turns out pride made an appearance in me on the race. Nothing like being humbled by the presence of pride.
“Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.�
Yikes. I don’t like falling. In high school I fell through a hole in the 2nd floor storage closet landing directly on my tailbone onto a concrete floor fifteen feet below. It was the day before Valentine’s Day. Pat Shanks thought it was hilarious. Jerk.
Hurt my bum.
I didn’t know the trap door was even there to be able to fall through. Pride does the same thing. It creeps in unnoticed under the name of confidence until you begin to fall unaware of the presence of a trap door.
Confidence in self is pride.
Confidence in the Lord is assurance of standing on solid ground.
Falling on your face in front of a group of people is embarrassing. Falling on your face in front of your Lord and Maker brings humility. This is a season for me to give up control. I can’t be a squad leader out of my own abilities. Well, actually I can, but I would be missing the point. It may work for a while. I could lead by giving a few rants here and there about where we should be as a squad out of my own voice, but when I listen to the Lord’s voice something different happens. “Not my will but thy will be done.�
I think that I have tried to lead the Spirit rather than being led by the Spirit lately.
It’s very possible I have fallen a couple times trying to lead this race thing out of my own abilities. There is a difference between leading out pride, which leads to frustration, and leading out of humility, which leads to love.
Valentine’s day I went back to school. I sat on one of those inflatable donut things all day loaded up on some narc. Katie and Jenny took compassion on me and gave me kisses on the check that day. I liked that.
This is what the Lord is saying to me.
Rise up my son!
I will restore you to a place of gladness.
You will lead out of love.
Proverbs 24:16, “Though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again.�
