Congratulations, people of the world who read my blog! You get to learn something about me that a very few number of people know. As you may have read a few blogs ago, I have a deep, unsettling fear of being alone and forgotten. As a result of this, I have begun having a reoccurring dream. I have had it a total of four times, beginning in February. In the dream, I feel completely conscious, knowing where I am, who’s around me, etc. But as the dream continues, everyone and thing begins to vanish completely from existence. All people continue to fade. And then, even God ceases to exist. I end up totally, utterly, and completely alone. And it lasts until I wake up in the morning. Time seems to pass at its normal pace. I am alone for the entire time I am asleep.
The days after I have this dream, my demeanor is different. I am withdrawn. I see the glass as half empty.
At one of our sessions during debrief, our great squad mentor, miss Hope Mendola said something that set me thinking. She essentially said, when things suck, your better off thanking God for those situations. And I did.
Thank you God for my dreams and fear of being alone, because it reminds me to invest in my team and in your word and in you.
I encourage you to do this in everything you do. If you have a job you hate: Thank you LORD for this job, because it is a reminder of your provision. If you’re in bed sick: thank you God for giving me this opportunity to be in your word and spend more time with you. Choose an attitude of gratitude (Ha! Rhyme….) over an attitude of victimization.
Sent from my iPad
