Sometimes, life lessons can come in the tiniest of packages.
These last few weeks have been chaotic. Each day I wake up with the undone things from yesterday threatening to swallow me alive, and within moments a whole litany of new stresses coma barging through my door (be it in a bedroom, living room, or even car).
In asking my team to pray for me, one of the girls reminded me:
"What you are able to believe so easily in times of peace still stands true in times of chaos."
So what do I believe?
God is GOOD.
Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him. Psalm 34:8
God is LOVE.
But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8
God is OMNIPOTENT (all powerful).
Jesus replied, "what is impossible with men is possible with God." Luke 18:27
God is OMNISCIENT (all knowing).
For God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything. 1 John 3:20b
God is FAITHFUL.
But the Lord is faithful, He will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. 2 Thessalonians 3:3
If God is good, and He loves me as much as He does, and He knows everything and can do anything, and He's faithful to the end, then really, how can I feel anything but peace at every turn in the sometimes rocky, winding road?
The biggest blessing in my life these last few weeks has been babysitting the most adorable girls in the world, for a couple that I respect and admire more than a blog could ever express. I'm thinking about asking them to adopt me.
(all of these pictures are from my phone– Molly LOVES being a supermodel. the quality isn't great, but Kent and Carey if you want them I'll email them. there's like a million.)
Emma and her car stroller
Molly and Emma
Molly and Audrey
Audrey and Molly
little Emma trying to faceplant in the water– Audrey's super fly shoes.
note my hand holing Emma back?
These girls LOVE going outside.
Here's the thing. Emma wants to run around with and like the big girls, but at her toddler state, she just can't do it. She gets some momentum going, then trips over her little feet and faceplants, only to get up and do it again. Always, I'm right there, making sure she's running in places where it's ok for her to hit the ground.
When we go to the playground, she likes to climb up to the slide. It's hard for her, but most of the time she can do it. Often, she looks at me with her perfect little Emma face, asking me in wordless noises to get her up.
I rarely do.
I love these girls more than anything, but that doesn't mean I'm going to do her growing for her– she has to learn, both mentally and physically, how to get herself off the ground. Sometimes that means tripping and falling and being brave enough to get up and try again.
What she doesn't realize is that at every step of the way, I'm right there. My hand is centimeters from her tiny little body (or sometimes holding onto her as she tries to run places she shouldn't). There is nothing she does that happens outside of my knowledge, and nothing I will allow her to do that could put her in serious harm.
This is a lesson I've learned before, that every parent is probably laughing at because they see the illustration every day, but it's never a bad one to have repeated.
How much more does God love me than I love these girls? And how much wiser and powerful is He?
That's a rhetorical question, by the way.
My life feels like a mess. I've fallen face first into a puddle that's deeper than it looked, and I feel like I'm drowning.
But what is so easy to believe in times of peace still stands true in times of chaos: God loves me and isn't going to let me drown. He might let me struggle, fall, even feel abandoned.
But He is RIGHT HERE, no matter what.
I believe that when I'm breezing by on cruise control, I can show the world its truth when I'm fighting for air.
Training Camp is next week. The Lord has been so faithful up until this point- I've received so many donations, both financially and gear stuff. This week I'm going to be putting together a prayer team. If you're interested, please let me know! I'm trying to have people praying for me every day while I'm down there.
The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn His face toward you
and give you peace.
Numbers 6:24-26
