I found this post that I never wrote way back when in July. I don't know why I didn't post it. but it's kind of applicable now.
because I don't want to go home.
I want to go to Africa.
There’s something to be said for feeling normal, something magical about slipping into a perfectly fitting pair of skinny jeans and camping out at a coffee shop with your Bible and your laptop, sunglasses on and the world at bay.
Ok, maybe my skinny jeans don’t fit me because I feel like I’ve become a fat cow on the Race, but the rest of it is pretty accurate.
Why is it that the world seems better when I feel normal? Why do I feel invincible in heels and eyeliner and so vulnerable in chacos and frizzy hair? Am I really that shallow, or is there more to it?
Maybe it’s because the Race has a way of unsettling you and making the unsettling process part of the new norm. No one likes to feel uncomfortable, and making it a habit is downright insanity. And yet, that’s what we’re attempting to do- become so out of sorts that we’re forced to learn and to grow, to mature and be refined, to help one another onto greatness and in turn discover we’re moving there ourselves.
Yuck.
These stolen moments in coffee shops have become a haven, a place of safety as the world- quite literally- crashes around us, with screaming children pulling our hair, frantic mothers begging prayer over their families, old men asking us to help them any way we can. Outside these doors, Africa is waiting to be saved, but safe in this caffeine- buzzed bubble, I can turn my headphones off and pretend it doesn’t exist.
But it does.
All too soon my laptop will die, the caffeine will be surging through my bloodstream,demanding action, and all of the highlights in my Bible will be propelling me forward.
I can’t stay in safety forever, as appealing as that sounds. I was made for more. I was made to hug and pray and help and hold and calm and soothe and encourage and empower and teach and preach and speak and challenge and grow. Sitting in a coffee shop is nice for a moment, but this is my life, and it’s the only one I get.
So get ready, Africa- as nice as Normal is, her days are numbered, and the chacos are about to come back out.
