Today we end our last week of ministry here in Swaziland with full hearts and spirits knowing we poured out everything. Saying goodbye to the precious little faces that became part of my temporary home has been one of the most challenging moments thus far. As I held one of the weeping children who came to terms that our time together had come to an end it broke me in ways I was not emotionally prepared for. In a puddle of tears, I prayed over her life and gave her one final hug. These are the moments where I repeat Psalm 146:9 “The Lord sustains the fatherless and widows.” (A verse I clung to for many years in my youth as well.) I may be leaving, but the lasting impact of the Holy Spirit will always sustain. The picture of the children seeing us in the distance and immediately sprinting out to meet us is how I imagine Christ welcoming His beloved children with open arms whenever we run towards Him.
I am at a loss of words looking back seeing how the Lord moved in the midst of the mayhem and how His faithfulness was so apparent when all I felt was complete and utter exhaustion each day. I can firmly say that I know what it is like to feel so physically drained that you must forcefully conquer each step with tenacity; a whole new level of ‘pushing through.’ It has been a daily battle of refocusing my mindset from self-oriented comfort to knowing my purpose is far greater than my own desires. In the small and large moments, I am keenly aware of the Lord’s persistence in chasing me down. I have cherished every moment from the craziness of being a human jungle gym to laying still in my hammock watching the sunset as I rested in the presence of Christ. I forevermore will sprint into my heavenly Father’s arms.
Some of our time this week consisted of house visits where we were able to continue forming deeper relationships within the adult community. I had the blessing of leading and teaching small groups of young girls the importance of Christian femininity and what it looks like to live as a woman of God in a broken world. It is something I am passionate about in my own life as I strive to find the right balance of strength, boldness, individuality, self-expression, and gentleness. Going the distance to fulfill all we are called to be as women of God involves our whole being.
I can honestly say that these last couple days were as much of a push of endurance as ministry itself. Yes, I am exhausted, and yes, I wouldn’t change any of it for the world. The spontaneity of every moment here in Swaziland fuels my craving for adventure. The atmosphere here is nothing short of daily escapades and surprises. I have come to the realization that a scheduled time in Swazi is more of a suggestion than a mandatory meeting. Being the woman that I am, I have no problem with the term “fashionably late.” The concept of flexibility is one of the things that I will miss most once getting back to the punctual chaos of home.
Dear Swaziland, departing is such sweet sorrow. Though I am already missing the people and community I have come to love, I welcome this new transition to South Africa with open arms, too. Thank you for every memory. I will even miss the gritty feeling of red dirt between my toes, but the ants and cockroaches… not so much. This is not goodbye but rather, “See you later…
I look forward to sprinting towards you the next time we meet, whether it is in this life or the next. You are in my heart always and forever!”
Prayer Requests
Week 4
• Smooth transition: We are currently embarking on a 24-hour bus ride to Jeffery’s Bay, South Africa. Prayer for safe travels, health and uplifted spirits is greatly appreciated.
• Health: For myself as well as a few of my teammates who are still struggling with sickness. I’m over it… or wish I was.
