I keep telling myself “all things are possible with Him”(Matt 19:26). Easier said than believed. Like when you stare at $4,983.34 in your account for 2 weeks with no change (literally 🙂 ). To be completely honest this whole process of fundraising has been EXTREMELY tough. I have wrestled back and forth with the Lord over it all.
Going into it I had this view that God always makes us wait till the last minute then He sweeps in and saves the day. I told Him at the beginning that I didn’t want Him to do that. Haha I just wanted Him to do it quickly and differently. Mistake number one. Don’t tell the Lord what to do. No will of my own is better than the will of the Lord. And He never does any miracle the same.
My heart was prideful in thinking God would do it fast because “my family knows some really great people who will surely donate”. Mistake number two. God directs and brings the funds in His timing. The money has actually come from more unexpected people than expected.
I had expectations. Mistake number three. You can’t expect people to give. I found myself getting frustrated with my friends who haven’t given. I was equating their love for me by whether or not they donated to my trip. Awful I know.
I know I have made mistakes too many to count anymore but despite me God is working. I need to say that again, despite me GOD is working.
Why does He do that? Right now I am crying just thinking that He LOVES me sooo much to work through allllll of my craziness and mistakes.
Nothing else satisfies, nothing else substitutes, and nothing can separate us from His love.
Romans 8:38-39
Boom. His love isn’t going anywhere. Nothing I do or don’t do will change the amount or desire He has to LOVE me.
I am here to tell you that there is over $10,000 in my account!!! It came exactly 2 months to the very day I started this journey!!!! In one day my account more than doubled. And boy is it ONLY by the LOVE of the Lord! Remember He works despite us. THANK YOU Jesus for your provision in our lives!
I pray Lord that I would trust you more and more through this whole process. I pray I would stop leaning on my own understanding but acknowledge you in EVERY area of my life. I pray for my friends who are reading this that they would also trust you with their finances and every part of their lives. Lord help us all grow in the knowledge of your love so that we can walk in it, rest in it, and freely give it to all just as you have freely given it to all.
Blessings and Unconditional Love,
Moriah
