“I take the time to stop and unwind, and listen to the sound your sweet, sweet voice.” – I Am Listening by United Pursuit
Here’s a confession: most of the time I feel like I am talking to a wall when I pray and do not feel the presence of God. I wonder if I am doing something wrong and if God truly does speak to people. I become envious of those who hear His voice clearly. I become angry and frustrated with God because I want to hear His voice and feel His presence.
Due to my anger and frustration, I start to feel hopeless that I’ll hear the Lord’s voice. Since I feel hopeless, I feel like there is no reason to try and communicate with God – no reason to study the Word or to have a conversation through prayer because it feels one sided. One thought starts a chain reaction of others and catapults me further away from the Lord.
The Lord is ALWAYS speaking, I’m just choosing not to listen. And that’s why I continue to miss His voice. If I approach Him with an attitude of dismay and doubt that He will speak, I am more than likely to dismiss His voice.
Instead of saying that the Lord has failed to speak to me, I should say I have failed to listen for God’s already present voice. The accusations should be towards me, not the Lord.
When looking through the beliefs of Adventures in Missions, the organization that World Race is through, I was scared of the concept of listening prayer. I was unfamiliar with it and confused at what was meant by it. I was afraid that the leaders of my squad and my fellow squad mates would be hearing His voice while I heard nothing. Afraid that they would look down on me and my faith. I felt like I was the only person to be accepted to the World Race that was skeptical of being able to hear the Father.
Thankfully that’s not the case and I have been met with grace. Previous World Racers that had the same doubts as me. Hearts which have been softened by the Father and given a new, deeper perspective of His character. People which have called out my actions and bitter heart in love with gentleness and truth, reminded me of the path of confession and repentance available, and supported me as I journey into deeper intimacy with the Lord.
Listening prayer does not make complete sense, but that drives me to keep digging deeper and finding answers. Seek out truth and seek out His voice.
