It’s pretty late but my mind is moving a million miles an hour right now, and I wanted to share a little bit of my heart. This post honestly might come out resembling a big word mess – I apologize if it doesn’t make sense – it’s purely my thoughts. Think of this more like a journal entry, ya feel?
Love has been on my mind a lot lately.
You’re probably thinking “duh!”
I get it, I get it! God gives us his greatest commandments, to love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and to love your neighbor as yourself.
So, yes love should always be on your mind, and of course, that’s what I’m striving for but sometimes love isn’t that easy (or at least I seem to fall short at living it out, maybe I’m the only one).
But love has been on mind in a way that has led me to evaluate how I view love? The Lord has been teaching me a lot about love during my quiet time, sermons, serving, people, friendships – it’s been everywhere. I’m learning to love in ways I never imagined I could.
We love because he first loved us. (1 John 4:19)
For the sake of trying to keep this as short (or as short as I possibly can), I’m going to tell you three things from this week that have really knocked me down and caused me to truly sit and ponder on love..
1. No matter how hard I try I cannot fully comprehend God’s love for me (nor will I ever). God’s love is unconditional, selfless, abundant, unchanging, steadfast, and comforting. God’s love compels us to love others. God’s love took action..God’s love was sending his only son to die for our sins because “God so loved the world.” God’s love calls us to take action. Then I have to ask myself… is my love taking action? how does the way I love compare to the way God loves?
2. When I tell people about my trip, people seem to quickly point out that it’s a “once in a lifetime” opportunity. They list off things about all the traveling, adventure, and awesomeness that those 11-months are going to bring. And honestly I lose sight of the true reason I’m going and catch myself thinking about those other parts a great deal more. But I don’t want those things to be my main source of excitement or the things that stick out to people when they hear about my trip. I want them to see that God’s love is so great that it has compelled me to go tell others. Not because I think I’m anything special but because his love impacted me so much that I couldn’t think of anything better than leaving behind my comfortable life to share hope and love with the hopeless.
I like what Bob Goff says in Love Does, “I used to think you had to be special for God to use you, but now I know that you simply need to say yes.”
Let me simply say yes. Let me view my trip as a privilege to be used for furthering the gospel. Let me put love into action. When others hear about my trip let them only hear about Jesus.
3. My first time ever going to the Alabama Baptist Children’s Home was March 3rd…That was the day my love for these kids wrecked my heart (I mean it hit me hard) and I cannot stay away.
In the last few weeks my time at ABCH has grown quite a lot and so has my love for these girls. Just as I feel I’m making progress with them, I feel them push me away. It’s almost a cycle I can see coming but still somehow surprises me every time. I can’t blame them. When you’ve been let down so many times by the people who are meant to love you the most, you begin to question the validity of the love from the people around you. They’ve heard so many empty promises, been neglected, abandoned, and hurt, and experienced things children shouldn’t have to ever experience. They have been orphaned.
God has been teaching me so much about love in my time at ABCH. I know that in order to grow their trust I have to show them a different love than they are used to.
I’m learning…
love is patient. – it is taking time to knock down walls but I’m not giving up.
love isn’t always easy. – it might mean handling their sometimes mean, hateful comments with grace followed by reassuring my love for them. I feel like they’re sometimes trying to see how far they can push me to see if my love keeps coming back. – God’s love is relentless and unconditional. He pursued me even when I wanted nothing to do with him.
love can be as simple as showing up. – The Bibles calls us to visit orphans in their affliction. It doesn’t tell us to donate $10 and go about our day, it tells us to show up and care for them. – sometimes the love they need most of all is to simply keep showing up and showing them you care.
love is sticking to your word and following through. – these kids know broken promises all too well. It’s sad. God’s love doesn’t break promises and it always follows through so to love like Jesus is to keep your word and see them to the end.
to love more and more like Jesus.
Thank you so so much for staying with me until the bottom. I apologize that the post was so long but as my community I feel it’s so important that you know what the Lord is doing in my life. We often think of missions as something you have to go oversees for but there are people hurting and longing for love and the gospel all around us. I am incredibly thankful God is using me as an instrument for spreading his great love, and through my experiences he is revealing a deeper meaning of love.
This season of my life is filled with growth and preparation for the months to come. Join my journey by subscribing, donating, and/or praying!
