Before leaving for the World Race I would hear “You call me out upon the waters, the great unknown” and tears would instantly begin to flow. Whether I was in a car, at church, seeing Hillsong in concert, where ever it was, it was an instant down pour of tears.
I don’t know what it is about “Oceans” by Hillsong United, but something about it shakes the core of my spirit.
Maybe its because the lyrics of the song are the cry of my heart and the reality of this life I am living, or maybe its because I have always craved “more”. More to this life, more to who I am, more of faith, more works, more trust, just more of everything. Im not quite sure, but still to this day I cant hear it without getting chills (I’ve gotten the tears little more under control….some times.)
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, where ever you would call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wonder, and my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my Savior.”
As I head home in 11 short days I am beginning to process what home will look/ be like. Ive began to process what my fears are, and what I am excited about.
This life I have lived the past 10 months have been nothing short of incredible. Constant community, y’all Im talking haven’t been alone in months, exponential growth, and so much more.
Although I am eager for Chick-Fil-A filled days, and comfortable nights, my heart breaks as I think about leaving these people I have done life with for 11 straight months.
As we were asking ourselves some questions last night about home I was thinking “what are my fears in going home?”
This seems like a weird question, because home is what should be my normal or where I am most comfortable. But how do you walk back into an unchanged place as a completely different person? How do I function in this calling and walking out my purpose when Im right back in the exact same place where I used to live in sin and constant disobedience?
And then “Oceans” started playing and I heard the Lord’s voice so clearly
“Home is me leading you where your trust is without borders, home is you walking on the water, home is where I have called you. Home is deeper than your feet could ever wonder, and Morgan, your faith will be made stronger in my presence.”
Home is not my comfort. For me, leaving is easy, being away is easy. Home is hard. Home is uncomfortable. BUT no matter how scary, uncomfortable, uneasy I am about this new season, I am confident that I am in the exact place the Lord has called me too.
So heres to home, heres to being more uncomfortable, heres to walking in new identity and make new life norms, heres to exponential growth, and living life on mission.
Heres to this new, beautiful, life changing season I am walking into!
