I’m not sure how much you can prepare for transition, it seems like it is at a distance and then BAM it hits you in the face. Then all of a sudden you relieze that you are in the middle of the biggest change of your life so far and that you have no idea how to prepare for it. This time last year I was in transition….but nothing like this. I had no idea that that season was preparing me for this one and that any of it mattered. I haven’t blogged in so long and I am sorry for that. Honestly I just didn’t know what to say. The most mundane decisions have been the death of me lately. Which socks to pack, travel bible vs. study bible, will my squad actually like me, and how the heck do I condense my closet in to two large packing cubes. All of these questions and more. The things that are really of little consequence seem too be keeping me up into the wee hours of the night. I haven’t gone to bed before 3 AM in over a month and to say that I am sleep deprived would be an understatement. I am basally a walking zombie. My prayers have lacked zeal, bible is starting to collect dust, and I have not looked in a mirror in so long it seems. Is this normal? I have no idea what to expect or how to continue to prepare my heart. I thought I had been doing that but then here I am in my first dilemma and I cant seem to crawl out of this hole.
There is so much for me to do here still…..there is a Christmas concert coming up, oh and umm..Christmas with my family, and cleaning my life up before I go, and packing ,and….on and on and on. I know what I need to do but I just can’t move and get anything done. I think I need some serious peace and prayers…..would you pray with me? I did not want to write this blog and I do not want to feel like this.
