Learning to Die – Part 2

I wrote about Learning to Die with Dudu two months ago.  Since then I’ve e-mailed with pastor Gift in Nsoko and asked how she is doing.  His report…”Dudu is getting worse everyday.  The best way to describe it: she is just bones now and that is another cruelty of HIV/AIDS, it does not kill you fast but punishes you all the way.  Sinethemba (we have hope), that is Dudu’s baby boy is well, but eats a lot.”
 
Dudu’s face is ingrained in my mind.  Her strained voice, barley louder than a whisper seems to shout.  Even after two months back in the US I still think about her often, wondering if the AIDS has swallowed her, wondering if she has been set free from this life of pain and disease.  I cried through the video below, it was hard to see her even weaker,  closer to death. 

(Praying for Dudu and Sinethemba at church in Swazi)

 

At 26 years old, Dudu is grappling with the reality that she will not get to see Sinetemba past his infancy.  She won’t have the luxury of hearing his first word, telling him bedtime stories, or kissing his scrapped knee.  She will never get to see this beautiful, thirsty, baby boy grow into a man, wave goodbye to him on his first day of school, or teach him to tie his shoe.  When he cries she won’t be there to circle her arms around him and whisper that everything will be all right.  Her death will come before she knows if he has escaped the monster we call AIDS.

Most likely, Dudu has a few weeks left; maybe it’s a few days.  I have no pat answers, no beautifully articulated words of hope, but I know that God holds her during this time as she looks into eternity.  

While in South Africa, shortly after meeting Dudu, God gave me an idea…  What if we could work with parents like Dudu and write out their stories, their advise, and their love notes, as a legacy for their children?  What if we could take family pictures, and make something beautiful to leave those who are left behind?

This summer I’m leading a Young Adults trip back to Nsoko through North Coast Calvary and this is one of the projects we will be working on.  We are naming the legacy books, the Sinethemba (we have hope) project, after Dudu’s son.