The month in Swaziland opened up my box to different ways to discipline, and in that how the Lord disciplines. The children here do not respond to "no" or "stop" or movements to get them to stop something they shouldn't be doing, like hitting each other. We've been asking each other, "What do we do? What normally works isn't." Twice I've seen a child acting out in aggression either toward a Racer or toward another child, and to discipline with "no" or "don't do that" had no effect; this has been the consensus among both teams.
One day racer Bekah Spurgeon and I were stacking wood and one of the little boys picked up a stationary (thank goodness) chain and started to throw it in our direction. We both looked at him and told him to stop, telling him that wasn't okay. He continued in his throwing actions with even more vigor and scowl. Bekah and I looked at each other…what do we do? Then Bekah said, "I'm just going to hug him." To which I thought, "Watch out for the chain." I watched as Bekah walked over to the little boy, wrapped her arms around him, and kissed him on the forehead. And then I watched as the child dropped his arms as if in defeat, like he just couldn't fight with that; he dropped the chain and walked away.
- Stern discipline did not work, but love did.
I followed Bekah's lead a few days later when I saw a young boy take a swing from a little girl. Keeping what I had seen earlier in mind, instead of scolding the boy, I picked up the crying little girl and comforted her. I held her and loved on her until she seemed content. The little boy eventually left the swing and I placed the little girl on it to enjoy. When the young boy came back and tried to take it back, I simply pulled him to me and hugged and loved on him, gently telling him it was her turn, and he calmly obliged.
I was on to something, and I shared it with my crew… "No, stop, and don't do not work, however, hugging them and showing them love will redirect their actions. And it did, every time.
This has had me thinking about how the Lord disciplines. The Bible tells us that "The Lord disciplines the ones He loves" (Proverbs 3:12, Hebrews 12:6) and my dad and I use to joke that the Lord loves us a WHOLE lot. 😉 God does use consequences and sometimes directly speaks to me when I do wrong, guiding me in how to do right, but so many times, most of the time, He does it through love. Gently loving on me when I pitch a fit or lash out in anger, comforting me when I want something and am being selfish, and showing me that His presence and love are better than anything, freeing me from sin and helping me to love others better. Yes, He disciplines the ones He loves because He's a good Papa, but I'm learning that looks a lot different than I think it does, and He's teaching me how to do that better, how to do it in love. As my spiritual mentor has told me, "The Gospel is not about behavior correction, it�s about resurrection." Looking back, so much of how God has resurrected me out of my sin struggles, my old ways, my bad habits, and my destructive and selfish wants has been through His perfect love, His ever-present hand, His gentle tug and His comforting touch.
I still have a lot to learn about the discipline of love; learning more and more about the character of God, and learning more and more about how I am to imitate that love.
- ~~~ The Gospel is not about behavior correction, it's about resurrection. ~~~
