I am brought to the sight of me in America, each foot stepping in front of the other as I go on stage in front of my church to tell my Statement of Faith. I am terrified. I was not a public speaker in the slightest, and like always before a word escaped from my lips I felt the coolness of the tears rush down my scared face. That was six years ago and today you would not guess that that same terrified girl, afraid to speak in front of an audience, was me.
In that same summer of 2012, going into my freshman year, God told me I would be a missionary… but I never told anyone the last part God told me. It’s a secret I have been too afraid to tell anyone. He gave me visions of myself preaching the gospel. I knew that God could do miracles, but I was so shy and terrified of speaking in front of others and I didn’t see how He would change me to be able to speak in front of others.
Today, I am currently sitting on my sleeping pad (my bed for nine months) planning a sermon and testimony, about to head to ministry. Every day I go to a new place around Malawi, Africa, and I see a new, more confident, picture of myself. I see a 19 year old woman who is speaking with a smile that reaches the corners of her mouth. I see a woman who puts each foot in front of the other and yes, still is a little nervous to speak but is able to do it with confidence. I see a woman who has trusted in this secret promise God had placed on her heart about 5 years ago, not knowing if she would ever be capable of living out that vison, but choosing to trust in a God that can use anyone, even a man named Moses who did not have words, to build a nation.
Since being here, every day of the week God has given me new ways to spread the gospel and used me as His vessel to speak to those who have never heard of Jesus or are just learning about Him. He has placed me here to speak to small groups, large groups, children, women, and men. I have spoken next to houses hoping people would gather from the houses nearby, in rural villages hours outside the small city I am near, in a new building a man and women have dedicated as a church, and on wooden planks resting just over the dirt because a church is the people and not necessarily a place. Every day since givin those visions, I look back and see how, because I have trusted completely in Him, He has equipped me with confidence. Is it easy? No. But has it been worth it? Yes!
Thank You for reading. Logan, one of my teammates, needs your help. She still has to raise over 6 thousand for the mission trip BEFORE the end of February. You can support her at http://Loganmcnamee.theworldrace.org
