“Maybe if I was younger.”
“Wow, I could never do something like that.”
“You’re so brave, I couldn’t even think about doings something like that.”
When you express that you are going on an eleven month mission trip to eleven different countries, a typical response is like those above said with amazement, shock, and sometimes with a small bit of shame. Its something I hear sitting in a pew at church when telling people I’ve known my whole life sitting next to me, see it in blog comments, and relaxing with friends.
Its supposed to be comforting. Its supposed to make me feel brave. I’m supposed to see that I’m doing more.
The thing is that I’m not a John the Baptist. I’m more a Jonah sitting on the beach after being vomited out by the whale, thinking about how maybe sitting in the stomach of a whale wasn’t that bad.
You see, I’ve been thinking about the World Race for a while now… almost three years. I first heard about the World Race like many racers through a person who was doing the race. Sitting in my dorm room, looking at Facebook when the minutes until my next paper due ticking down, I saw a co-worker from the camp I worked at advertising for a spaghetti dinner. Not knowing what this thing was, I typed quickly typed “The World Race” into google and clicked on the first option.
If you’ve never been to the home page for the world race, you should go and then watch the video. I’ll wait… So now you’ve seen my first introduction the world race. You may also feel the intimidation of something like that, the thrill of something like that, the fear and the spark. Some of you like me, feel the the call but also the fear and think “NOPE.”
You see, God has to hit me over the head with a lesson multiple times before I get the lesson. For instance, all my life I have been struggling to find a community. A place that I felt like I fit. When I went to training camp, I finally felt like I found it, but this week I was reminded that this wasn’t the first time God had offered me this sort of family. Its not the second time. Its not the third. God has offered me love and connection every day of my life. I chose the fear of rejection from people over the love of God, just chose the fear of failure over the World Race.
Now I look at what I’m doing and hear the voices of those around me say, “I could never do that.” My enemies whisper quietly “You can’t do this either.” Those around me say its a lot of money to raise and my enemy says “You can’t raise it.” My to-do list says there’s a lot to be done and my enemy says “You’ll never be ready in time, maybe you should give up… You’re running out of time.”
Maybe there’s something in your life you are running from. Maybe there is a tug on your heart to do something or go somewhere, to forgive someone or yourself, to cut ties with the unhealthy fear in your life. Are you ready? Are you ready to move forward and not let the voices telling you that you aren’t enough, and that you can’t do this win?
It took me almost three years to answer the call. Even when the fear said no, God organized my life around taking this step. It took one phone call to AIM to take that one step away from my convenient safe life.
Start your next step by taking a moment to pray with me today.
Will you pray with me today that the fear won’t hold you back? That the you will let Jesus into the dark places in your heart and unleash the love you been holding back?
Will you pray with me that in my own personal journey that God will move me past my fears about funds? That he will move in the hearts of my future supporters and they will say no to the fear of sacrificial giving and claim their God as bigger.
Will you pray with me that God will comfort my own heart. That he will give me a spirit of mindfulness so I can accomplish all the tasks that need to be done.
Will you pray with me that our enemies will put a muzzle on it and their voices will be quieted? Quieted so only God’s words can be hear, only Jesus’s love will be seen, and only the Holy Spirit will move.
