When I arrived back in Thailand a week ago, I was overwhelmed. My heart ached for the comforts of home and relationships I was leaving behind. My soul longed for the identity of who I was, knowing I had left that girl on the other side of the world. My feet hit foreign soil, and God began to strip me of everything. He took everything comfortable. He took everything familiar. He took it all in a matter of minutes. As he took, all I wanted was to go home. I wanted to go back to comfort. He was calling me deeper. Yet, I wanted the World Race I had seen on instagram. I wanted cute kids, lots of laughter, beautiful scenery, and good coffee. I wanted to feel the Holy Spirit’s presence, but I was having a hard time.
When my team and I arrived in Rayong, Thailand we were placed in a tiny apartment, home to two rats named Clementine and Timbleton. It was hot and dirty. It was nothing like social media portrayed the Race to be. As the minutes ticked on, God continued to strip me of everything comfortable. Calling me deeper still. He took everything until all I had was Him. Yet, even then, I tried too hard to find comfort in the few material things I had packed away in my pack. I was oblivious to all He was doing.
I was unaware of the beauty that was surrounding me. I didn’t know I had a choice, to choose joy. I didn’t realize that all I needed was Jesus. I didn’t fully comprehend that all He wanted was to be my comforter, as I was so desperately searching for comfort.
My friends, God is calling me deeper. It took a broken heart, many tears, and the mourning of an end to a season to realize it. I am only a week into the Race, and it has already been the hardest and most rewarding process.
So no, the World Race isn’t what social media portrayed it to be. It’s 9 months of tears, and hardship, doughnut nights and laughter. Its days where God takes everything you think you need, just to remind you all you need is Him. He surrounds you with thousands of people who all speak a different language, leaving Him as the only one to talk to. It’s hard, and it hurts. But man oh man, our Abba Father is so good. Choosing joy is so good. Life is so good. I am abundantly blessed, and continually being called deeper.
