This month some things happened that caused some pain in my heart. These things didn’t fully have to do with what was happening in the present moment, but more to do with pain I didn’t realize I was carrying from my past.
In all honesty, and to be really vulnerable, the last few weeks I have found myself trying to push away the presence of the Father because I have been afraid. Afraid to fully trust Him with certain places of my heart, and afraid to show him those places because even though I know that this is not true in my head, there was a fear that maybe His love would change toward me. While He has been teaching me to trust Him in the area of finances, I have found myself struggling that I can with some deeper things in my heart. There was a night where I was feeling so disconnected from Him and His still small voice was whispering and calling me to stop and worship Him. And as uncomfortable as it felt in that moment to not stay distracted, I allowed myself to acknowledge His presence. I was reminded once again that He never turns His affections away from us, and that Jesus reconciled us with the Father. He is not distant, and He brought us into His own presence, and washed us from the very thing that tried to keep us separated from Him. And with the painful things that came up this month, I was reminded that He has always present even in my pain.
Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault. But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it. Don’t drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News. The Good News has been preached all over the world, and I, Paul, have been appointed as God’s servant to proclaim it. – Colossians 1:22-23 NLT
Now, our job is just to choose to believe this, and stand firm in this truth. Sometimes we try and separate ourselves from Him, or forget that He is present with us. He is a present Father who waits gently and eagerly for us to become present with him. His patience and love for us (there are really no words) is so beautiful, and unending. We get to share this love with others to the world.
Although life has been super busy for me lately, and I am learning to stay present as I prepare for what is to come, I am eager for what He is going to do in this next chapter – the World Race. Thank you all for your love, support, prayers, and encouragement. Thank you to those who have invested into His Kingdom by sowing into this opportunity, as those seeds are going to be planted across nations and into people’s lives.
With love,
Miranda
