What is honor?
I grew up assuming that honor was something that was to be earned. You honor people who do good things. I was honored at awards' ceremonies for excellent grades and performing well in sports.
So I never realized I struggled with true honor.
I would treat people well, not being mean or hateful to them. However, my heart was not there. My actions were one of someone who was honoring but my heart wasn't. I was a hypocrite.
Honor is not what I thought it was. It is not about the character of the person I am honoring. You cannot earn honor, because honor is a reflection of my character. No one can ever do anything to deserve my honor. Honor is a decision I make, not a privilege that someone else earns. Honor has to do with my foundational character and the character of a holy God.
Most specifically I think back to my mom I grew up with in junior high. She made many mistakes and in my eyes the commandment, honor your mother and father, did not apply to her. (Exodus 20:12) God would understand how she was. He couldn't expect me to listen to her talk or not to be bitter towards her. But I am humbled to know He did and does still expect me to honor her, to value her. Because He values her.
Does that mean I do everything she says? No.
Does that mean I listen to her, truly listen, not just the passive head nod yes? Yes.
Does that mean I hold onto a bitter heart and judge her every action? No.
Does that mean I forgive her? Yes.
Does that mean I value her? YES.
Honor is about actions. It's not even really about me or you. It's about God. Do I really love God enough to put value on every person He has created?
I'm learning that's what honor is really about. It's about placing someone else as more important than you. To deny yourself and esteem someone else. To recognize the value they have.
"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." [Romans 12:10]
When I replace honor in this scripture with the word value, it takes on a whole new feel. It seems so much clearer what honor looks like. It looks like Jesus dying on a cross to give us honor. Something we didn't earn or desire. It was His action that brought us value. He thought of my value above His life.
So in turn, I get to give honor and value to those who were once like me, undeserving and unvalued. What an honor that is.
