There's so much I want to find out on my own. Not as in…pushing away other people or their thoughts? but rather that I want/need to go directly to the source. I'm exhausted of hearing different viewpoints. It's great to learn from? but it's not so great in which to inherit truth.
I mean…most Jesus followers have their own church home, their own small group, their own devotional book. And we are always inclining our ears to what OTHER people say. I'm not necessarily saying this is bad? but how often are the views different? or based solely on experience? or based solely on feeling? What if i don't feel the same way or experience the same thing? Does that makes it true for me? Even the way in which people interpret Scripture….it's inevitable that it will be sculpted around personal bias.
(Because I have such a desire, i try not to tune out too much when other people are opening up. I understand that this could make me ignorant to other people's words.)
I question how much I love Jesus and how much I've actually experienced him. I'm tired of HEARING that he's righteous and merciful and……
I want to find this out on my own. And it's ONLY gonna come through discovery of his Words.
I don't have a solid foundation to run with.
I don't know how much I've discovered truth on my own.
Here I am…willing.
