In complete honesty, this past week has been an emotional roller-coaster for me and if you are lucky enough to be a family member or close friend you got a front row seat to my own personal nightmare (sounds overdramatic, I know. Probably because it is)
Last Thursday I went up to our Residential Academic Service (RAS) Offices to add one more class to my schedule. (Adding this class would put me in a course overload which means I would have to pay more for each credit that I take.)
As I talked to the man at the desk he told me that I would be going two credits over which would put me at 19 credits for the semester. He proceeded to tell me that the price is significant and before I sign anything I need to go to Financial Services to see how much money it would be.
I walked over to the Financial Offices to find out how much this class would be. I was told the cost was $950 for every credit over 17. Since I was going two credits over, this class would cost me $1900. But surprise! I do not have $1900! I don’t even think I have $100!
I went back to RAS and asked how long I had to decide on the course, and he said tomorrow at 5:00pm (Friday).
-STAY WITH ME ITS ABOUT TO GET FUN-
The man working at the desk asked if I was graduating this semester and if I needed this class to graduate. After saying yes to both questions he told me to sit down so we could try to work something out. This man pulled up my graduation application and his face went flat. He then looked at me with the fakest smile I have ever seen. And he says to me…
“So, don’t freak out… but we have gone over your graduation application twice (..yes twice) and there have been some complications with your graduation application, and it doesn’t look like you are going to graduate on time” **He hands me a business card** then told me to email the people on that card immediately.
Fun right?
I emailed the ladies on the card and added my advisor in on the email. After a few emails, it was decided that I would have to wait until the following week (on Tuesday) to figure out if I was going to graduate on time and/or pay an extra $1900.
About five meltdowns later, I decided to call my mom and let her know what was going on (Maybe I should have done this first?). The only thing I could do at this point was wait. Absolutely everything was out of my hands.
I will be very transparent with you all, I was so mad at God, and I knew my anger would just get worse. I felt called to The Race, I really did. I have put time and effort into fundraising, and at the point I was at I was wondering if it was wasted. I’ve had many people praying for me through this process and I have so many people supporting me through donations which I am beyond thankful for. I 100% believed that every outcome in this situation was a bad one, I either couldn’t graduate on time, which would delay or possibly cause me to not even do the World Race or I’d had to pay $1900 for a class.
As the days passed I had so many people praying for my situation. I had family praying, friends from home, friends from school, even my incredible squad mates were praying, and WOW did God ever hear them.
I needed patience, and I had to relearn what contentment was. I had to relearn how to trust my own God. This past week I had to go back to the basics with God, I had to learn that in all things He will work it out for my good, whether that involves the Race or not. I do not need The World Race for God to use me and I need to be content with where He puts me. Each day got better and each day I gave more of myself and my situation to God and let go. When Tuesday came I was prepared to hear the sentence “you are not going to graduate”, and I would do my best to find rest in that because God’s plan is so much greater than my own.
I stepped into my advisor’s office as she welcomed me in. She grabbed a packet that had my degree audit and said in the most comforting voice “You are going to graduate on time”. She proceeded to tell me the arrangements she made. Guys, my advisor is incredible and jumped through hoops for me to graduate on time. Normally I do not like to ask for more than I’ve received, but I couldn’t help myself… Although I could graduate on time (YAY), there was still $1900 that I had to pay for this extra class. I then asked my advisor if there was any way I didn’t have to take that class or if a previous class could cover it so I didn’t have to take it (I was honestly kind of embarrassed for asking these questions, it seemed silly). She looked at my degree audit and looked at it intently. She then got up from her seat and told me to follow her! We were then in the head of the division’s office… She told him the situation I was in and he then looked at my degree audit. (Guys, I kid you not I was praying/screaming/cheering at God in my head at this point) It was absolutely beautiful when he said I am going to graduate on time, AND I do not have to take the class that would cost me $1900 extra dollars. God not only got rid of the obstacles in front of me, He got rid of my doubts as well.
Through this, I am reminded God wants to use me in The World Race and will plow through any obstacle to get me there. But I am also reminded that if God decides to not bring me on The Race, that is okay. The plan that God has for each of our lives is absolutely extravagant and beautiful and will not even compare to the plans we dream up in our own minds. I serve a faithful, trustworthy, constant God that never fails to amaze me, even when I fall short time and time again.
