Words can not justly describe what I feel when Im with my Papa. When I am transformed into his beautiful beloved and get to dance before him. When the world around me slips away and I enter our palace. When I get to dance for him in the quiet moonlight with the stars above and the wind around me.
Worship became feeble, simply singing to him the words of songs I have loved for so long was no longer filling me with the strength, love and comfort I received before.
My lover is so kind though. He can sense my need for a change. He new I needed a change of view. He was aware that I was still looking at myself from the past. I thought I was empty, that I had overflowed and poured out and needed to be refilled. I was confused and hurt thinking God was not filling me up, that I was remaining empty. I learned at debrief this was simply not true. God let me view my new self, a bigger more beautiful vessel. I was not feeling full because I have space for a lot more, I am in the process of being filled up, and it is not the same as before.
My worship is not the same as it was before either. This does not mean that I no longer worship threw songs, like my cup I am now able to hold more. I am now able to worship in more ways.
I can now sense when words pouring from my mouth are not enough, and when its time to seek out my flags and dance before him. To close my eyes and escape to our palace.
Rachel my squad leader brought several winged worship flags with her on the trip for us to use and I have fallen for them. I will be forever blessed by her gift. I believe our whole squad has been blessed by them, others have danced with them and others have been moved by watching them dance.
The flags are not something I simply wave around in the air, they hold power in them. When I come before my King and offer up worship with flags the Holy Spirit is with me and moving. His presence is palatable at times and I know that he is moving. The flags are handmade and prayed over. They come in different colors, each one holding their own meaning. Refreshment, power, fire, strength, wisdom, love and so much more.
I am honored to be given this gift and to be able to dance before my King as his beautiful beloved.
