I’m sitting here in a room alone, just being, for the first time in 3 to 4 months.
The house I currently live in has 12 other people in it, 3 of them in my room. So the only time I’ve been able to be alone has been when I have intentionally gone away to spend some time with Jesus.
Though I have very much enjoyed being alone the past few days, I have forgotten what the silence can do at times if you allow it. It creates space for so much anxiety and worry, and if your not careful past memories, things people have said, and other like opportunities to become offended and bitter are right there at the door to your heart and mind.
I almost wanted to share with you all the crazy amount of lies / disbelief / worry / fear and anxiety trying to bombard my mind. But as I almost typed it out I was overwhelmingly grateful for everything that I have learned in this season, and realized sharing all those details would do zero good.
Why would I want to come into agreement with lies, by typing them out and claiming them?
John 10:10 says The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.
The only thing these thoughts are doing is trying to still kill and destroy my peace, my faith, my hope, my joy. And enough is enough. I will NOT allow those things to be taken from me.
One thing I’m grateful for learning is that previously I would have these thoughts and feelings and I would TRY SO HARD to do better and to be better and to just STOP THINKING about x y and z.
But the past 3 to 4 months I have learned this whole Christian life is not about striving. An apple tree does not strive to produce fruit, it’s an apple tree it just simply “Be”s what its created to be, and apples come.
It’s so refreshing to be at a place of oneness with the Lord. A place where I dont have to strive, feel guilty, or shameful for the thoughts that sometimes flow through my mind. But rather I just “Be” with Jesus, ask him what he has to say about all the thoughts, if they are lies I give them to him replace them with a truth and move on.
This process can be found in two places in the Bible
ROMANS 12:2 TPT
Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in his eyes.
2 Corinthians 10:3?-?5 AMPC
For though we walk (live) in the flesh, we are not carrying on our warfare according to the flesh and using mere human weapons. For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds, [Inasmuch as we] refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God; and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One),
I hope this helps someone out there, whatever thoughts you are having that are stealing your peace, love, joy, hope……. you dont have to entertain them, and you also dont have to strive or feel guilty or shamefully for having them. Just simply BE and while your being ask Jesus what he thinks about your thoughts, give them to the Lord, allow his word and his Holy Spirit to begin to transform the way you think, if your thoughts are LIES replace them with TRUTH found in Gods Word.
Also side note. I want to say I am THANKFUL for the house of 12 people I live with. I love ALL of them dearly, and I wouldnt want to go through this season any other way. (I mean really what great preparation since I’m about to be in close quarters with 15 strangers who will soon be my best friends for 11 months).
Side note number 2…. we launch in 42 DAYS! AHH that is so exciting and somewhat scary at the same time. I do still need to raise roughly $7,000 in order to launch with my squad. I would LOVE if you would prayerfully consider partnering with me, and/or even sharing my information with any friends or family or business people who may want to be apart of expanding the Kingdom of God. I am so thankful for everyone who has supported me throughout this whole journey! Yall are amazing.
As always, there are FOUR ways you can partner with me in this journey!
1. Pray! Specifically at the moment for funds to come in, and also for my squad and our health as our first stop is in HIGH ELEVATION in the mountains in peru! So prayers our bodies will adjust well.
2. Donate! I am still needing about $17,000 total and $7,000 in order to launch.
3. Share!
4. Subscribe! Best way to keep up with me once I head out onto the field.
