There have
been a lot of tears lately. My heart is
a mess.
I have
purposely placed myself in a city that values everything that I hate. I knew it walking in. The Lord was very clear to point out how difficult
it was going to be.
But yet over
and over again I’m surprised by how hard
it has been.
After all,
it’s tough to tell a perspective employer that you don’t really care about building
your “career.” Or that your resume has
about a year and a half gap in it because you were on a “missions” trip. Or that the only real direction in your life
is the Sprit’s day to day leading.
Let alone all that talk of “Kingdom.”
It just
doesn’t translate.
In a city
of plans and goals and promotions and ladders and networking and busyness …… there’s a girl who just wants to retain a
bit of her identity and sanity.
It’s a
battle every day to claim the truth. That I am chosen and loved. That I
have value far greater than what my “title” offers. That I serve something and someone far better
than self-interest or wealth or pride or gain.
I know that
I am not OF this world or this Kingdom – but it’s still hard
while you’re IN it.
