Watch out for the rock in the road. Watch out for that chicken in the road. Watch out for that poop in the road. Watch out for the… hey, why are there 3 mizungus in the middle of the road? I wonder what they are doing here… Hey! They said hi to me and my buddy David! We are just walking home from work, I guess we have time to see what their deal is. I mean, it’s pretty abnormal to see white people here in Rwanda. Plus, they’re kinda cute. Well, they’re pretty dirty, and sweaty, and have that dirty-hippie look going (what’s with the one with the half dreadlocked hair?), but I guess they’re still kinda cute. I’m going to go talk to them. I can tell my friend David wants to too…
Hey! They want to talk to us too! What should I say? I don’t speak great English. I’ll try my best though. Wow. Is that a tattoo on one of their arms? I’ll ask her about it. It’s a tattoo of a bible verse? Maybe they’re Jesus freaks. I’ve heard of them. They look pretty nice though…
David, would you shut up! Don’t ask about the bible they are carrying, I’m trying to ask about their tattoos! You’re distracting them from me. Come on man. This is a team effort. Wait, what did they just say about the bible? The God in it is the same God who has been there all of eternity. Weird. That’s cool that they are into that whole God thing, but not me. Nope, I’ve been drunk a few too many times in my life and can’t seem to completely give up the bottle. My pastor himself told me that God ain’t got no time for drinkers, it’s the devil’s juice or something like that. That pastor kicked me right out of that church and made sure I knew that God had no love to give a man who occasionally had a beer or two. Or three. But that’s only sometimes…
What are these girls talking about, that God loves someone who drinks? Sure, Jesus suffered an insane amount of cruelty, beatings, whippings, pain, mocking, humiliation, separation from His Father (his own self, in a sense), and a torturously slow death of suffocation on a cross, the only thing holding Him up being the rusty nails through his palms and ankles. But Jesus only did that for the pastors, the humanitarians, the missionaries, the “good” people of this world. Me? Oh, I’m far from good. Why are these girls messing with me and telling me if Jesus had to do it all over again solely for me, He would? Why are they trying to get my hopes up like that? I know there’s no hope for me. I know it…
David, are you hearing this? They are trying to tell me that when Jesus came, He slaughtered sin itself and the life I used to live: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The old has gone, the new is here!” 2 Corinthians 5:17. I don’t know if I can even believe that God has any love for me. My whole life I’ve been told differently…
Hm. What am I going to do on this fine Sunday. I guess I could stop by the church the missionary mizungu girls told me about. Why not? I’ll have my buddy David come with me…
That was the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard. Is that a tear that just fell to the ground? God, if you’re even real, show me, give me something. I can’t keep living this way. As much as I try to convince myself I am, I’m not satisfied, complete, content or fulfilled. I need you, please. Please God. Show me…
Ok God. I see you. I see you and I want you. I want to stop living my life in this vacant shell of a body, this lonely existence, in this empty feelings. I want this unceasing love I’ve heard about. I want want the grace and acceptance and forgiveness these mizungu girls told me about, I want what they have! There was something different about them from the beginning, I could tell. And I want it. I want the peace and the sense of purpose and the knowledge that I am worth something. I want you God, I want you. I’m saying yes to You. Yes Lord, yes a thousand times…
This is what I imagine went on inside our new friend Reese’s head from when we first met him while we were on a prayer walk to when he gave his life to Jesus two days later at our tiny church. We all cried. There were many hugs after. There were angels rejoicing in heaven because one man chose to accept the most incredible and life-giving gift ever offered. We love you Reese, welcome to the family.
