I’ve known of Jesus pretty much my whole life. I was at church so much growing up that people teased me and asked if my mail was forwarded there. Most people would have thought that I was a devout and true Christian, myself included.
You see there is a different between knowing of Jesus and personally knowing Jesus. I knew a lot about Jesus, had many verses memorized, knew the stories by heart, led worship, preached, walked down to the front, baptized, the whole deal. But I didn’t know Jesus in my heart. I didn’t have a relationship with Him. I tried, but I was unwilling to trust and rely in Him it wasn’t until I was in my 30s and my world came crashing down on me that I gave Him my heart.
I was away at an Emmaus walk when the Lord spoke to me. He told me it was time to trust Him and He would help me give up my addiction to porn and my desire for same-sex attraction. He said to trust in Him and He will give me fullness of life and take care of my every need.
I won’t lie it hasn’t been easy. After 20 years of addiction and living in a life full of sin it wasn’t a piece of cake to just change how you live everyday. How you deal with stress, lust, and the need to be accepted. It will be 4 years this October since that faithful night and I won’t lie I have struggled and stumbled but it does get easier everyday. He gives me forgiveness and grace I need to get up, dust off and take another step.
A new Christian is a lot like a toddler learning to walk. First you roll over (sometimes in defeat), then you crawl (sometimes more than you want to admit) and then you stand up (with Jesus holding you up), then you take a step and just like that toddler sometimes you take a couple good steps and then you fall, but you never stop trying to walk and before you know it you have gone past walking and now you are running. I laugh and say it’s because Satan is chasing you trying to make you trip, but even so Jesus is always running the race right beside you.
So this Sunday I take the next step I am getting water-baptized. Now you may be saying “but I thought you were baptized as a child” and you would be correct, but I have not been baptized since I truly gave my life to Christ with my heart and soul.
If you are in Graham this Sunday I encourage you to come the 10:30am service at HighRidge Church and be my witness. You will be truly blessed, if you can’t it’s ok. They will be posted online by Tuesday!
Thank you so much for allowing me to share my story with you and I look forward to where God is leading me in this life!
In Christ,
Michael
