So far, this has been my favorite month, but it didn’t start out that way.
My month started out by filling in for the teacher because she went home sick. The grade five class gave me a warm welcome and a lot of grace while I tried to teach english, social studies, science, Nyanja, and math. The first two days I struggled by, and then the teacher was back. I sat in the room and read while the teacher taught. I would fill in when there was some free time, playing games and giving the students bible lessons, but other that that I read. I felt useless. I didn’t get why I was put in this class just to read and not contribute anything else. I didn’t mind reading, but I also felt like it wasn’t really ministry. I asked God multiple times why I was put in this class. I just didn’t get it.
On the weekends we would go out and evangelize and preach at church which was great, but Monday through Friday I read. Our host was a pastor and had an awesome collection of books and so I read more books than I ever thought possible. Evangelism was great and the Lord really grew me in that aspect, and I became more comfortable preaching which was neat.
Halfway through the month I reflected on ministry and while the others were teaching class all day and getting to be close friends with their teacher I started the comparison game and felt useless. I grew relationships with the students, but not anything long lasting. I felt like I wasn’t having a huge impact or making a big difference. But then the Lord showed me how much He was working in my heart. I was having an impact on those around me, but the Lord was working on my heart more. My intimacy with him grew like a wildfire and he was different things about myself that I had never paid attention to.
He showed me that I have confidence because He is my Father. He showed me what grace is and how to better live it out. He showed my how He is my defender and protector. He showed me how He cries, laughs, dances with me.
This month, I have a new relationship with Abba. My intimacy with Him and view of Him has completely changed. At the beginning of the month I was comparing how the Lord was working in my life to others, but then I found out how much He was working in mine too.
I got the opportunity to talk to our brothers and sisters in Christ about the amazing man who created us. I got the opportunity to grow in a way I would have never realized. I got the opportunity to learn more about our Father and teach the grade five kids about Him, too.
This month was amazing and God always knows what He is doing in our lives.
Below is a picture of grade five!
