If you’re an overthinker or advance preparer (like me) you’ll spend months acquiring knowledge, researching, asking a thousand questions, and freaking out about this crazy thing you’re about to embark on. This isn’t a be-all-end-all, but it’s definitely some of the things I wish I would have had little peek into before I left (or did, but didn’t realize how valuable it would be.) Here’s a little wisdom I wish I had:
* It won’t be as uncomfortable as you think.
Don’t get me wrong, the Race can be really hard. I’ve had several months of bucket showers, sweating to death, and carrying bricks, but it wasn’t my entire Race. I came on this thing almost expecting to suffer for God for 11 months, and most of the time I’ve had a bed, I’ve never had only a squatty potty (which aren’t even that bad), I’ve only had cold showers twice (though one time I had only scalding water. That was an adventure), and I’m in month 11. This absolutely depends on your route, you should prepare to be uncomfortable, but don’t think you have to prepare to be miserable. This is the world. People live in it. You can find wifi and AC and oreos pretty much anywhere. Plus there’s a measure of grace given to those with this calling, which makes the uncomfortable a whole lot more bearable. It’s definitely not like it is at home, but isn’t that why you left? Just don’t take on a martyr mentality and complain about being tired and uncomfortable all the time. Think back to right now sitting at home longing to be here. Would that version of you imagine yourself being here complaining?
* You don’t need half as much crap as you brought.
I remember packing and laying out my clothes going “how on earth am I going to have enough for a YEAR!?” I had 3 construction shirts, 3 nice shirts for teaching, 3 normal wear shirts, two sleep shirts, a long sleeve shirt, a jacket, and an assortment of skirts and shorts and long pants that matched with everything. Let me tell you something: I still get made fun of for how much I brought. It’s true, some months you only do construction or only teach English, so you tend to wear your 3 shirts for each category the whole month, that gets old. The truth is I could have bought clothes for those kinds of things pathetically cheaply, had a much lighter pack, and had the cool story of “I bought it in India.” For every article of clothing I had. As I say all the time: it’s the world. People live in it. You actually can buy what you need. You don’t need 1000 pounds of your favorite _________ to last you the year. You can buy Oreos everywhere. Plus there’s usually a South African brand of your eyeliner or shampoo or cotton pads that work better than the ones you loaded your pack with (and usually cost half as much as MAC). It’s totally ok to bring comfort things or your favorite toner (one of the best packing decisions I made) but don’t prepare for the apocalypse. You’ll be fine, I promise.
* It’s totally ok to bring your favorite comfort thing.
I talked to so many racers that said “I miss makeup. I really wish I would have brought my makeup. I didn’t wanna be vain.” Or “man I wish I brought my blanket. Cuddling with that is my favorite.” The truth is what you bring you have to carry, so if you’re ok with carrying it and it’s worth the weight, being on the Race is uncomfortable enough. It’s totally ok to bring something that makes that easier. Don’t overthink what other people thing and live a year in regret. You’ll know if it’s a distraction or a coping mechanism. There’s a separate bullet for that one.
* Don’t waste time on your phone.
Don’t be extreme and leave it at home unless God is calling you to do so. Communication and contact with home is good. But like they say 1,000 times at training camp and launch: you may only be in these places once in your life. Don’t waste them on the internet. Be aware of when tech is making you choose out of ministry and community, when you’re self-soothing or escaping from the uncomfortable, and if they are, DO SOMETHING about it. What would your month one self tell you? What is the Spirit telling you? (Or what would He tell you if you put your device away long enough to listen? Exactly…)
* Prepare some games and sermons before you go.
For the love of God (not just the expression, actually for the purpose of sharing His love) why did you come? At least part of it was to impact the world, right?? So what can we do, as foreigners and christians who show up in a strange country? We get asked to share. We get asked to teach English. Please, for the sake of excellence and doing what you’re called to WELL, don’t stand there and make something up. Put some thought into this. If you had some foreign missionaries show up at your school or church, wouldn’t you wanna hear what they had to share or teach, expect them to have some wisdom you didn’t? You’re a full time missionary. It’s your job to listen to the Father and be prepared to give an answer for anyone who asks. It’s your job to love and play with babies and bring the wealth of knowledge and ideas from the United States to help the educators and Sunday school teachers and pastors that are staying. Please have something prepared. Please don’t be put out or upset when they ask you to share. I know it’s easy to read this and say “oh, I would never be like that” – you’d be surprised. Pray for the right spirit every day before you leave (and while you’re here), but having things prepared will take the attitude out of it by a long shot. Do this well. Be prepared. (If you need some tips I have one word for you: Pinterest.)
* Let go of your expectations.
I know. Everyone says this 100 times at training camp and launch. What on earth does that mean? The month where I finally began to learn what that meant was my month nine. Please learn this before that far into your race. I was in Swaziland completely upset that this country I’d so looked forward to was nothing like what I imagined, so I sat there and poured out all my expectations in front of the Father and asked Him to come in and repair those broken expectations, replacing them with His heart and what He wanted me to expect. It became a practice I call “breathing Him into my expectations” : breathing out what I want, breathing in what He wants. It’s just another form of surrender, really, but it keeps your eyes much more focused on His heart for the world and much less on your own.
* You will see hard things: here’s how to handle them.
Grieving looks different for everyone. Different things strike people in different ways, or not at all. It may be something that you cry once about and move on or it may strike you over and over when you least expect it and think you should be over it by then. Let me tell you, seeing a child starve or go without shoes should NEVER get easy. I still ache for the paralyzed man I prayed for in India for 3 hours who didn’t get healed, the boy in 35° weather in Chile without a coat, and the hungry street kids who took some rotten chicken from the trash we were burning and began eating it – half-cooked – in front of us. It’s ok for those things to hurt. They hurt the Father’s heart more than they hurt our own. I just breathe John 16:33 over and over, “take heart, I have overcome the world.” It’s taking that hurt to Him and allowing Him to take it and heal it; trusting He cares for them more than we do. Breathe that pain out, invite Him into it, don’t run from it, and worship in the pain. He is honored so much in that worship; that is the real offering. Also that’s the only way to make sure that pain doesn’t turn into bitterness and resentment which will push you away from God. (Don’t believe me? Watch Machine Gun Preacher. That’s a good one to watch anyway: what happens when missionaries take on the Savior’s job and it consumes them. Just maybe not with your mom.)
* If everyone on your team strives to see each other more than they want to be seen, you will be unstoppable.
Bella Strafaci, my squad mobilizer, said this at training camp and it changed me. I’ve absolutely been on teams where I didn’t feel I had a place to be myself, didn’t connect, didn’t fit, etc. Facing that attitude with “how can I see other people on this team better than I can seek to be known” will inspire that attitude across your whole team, while inadvertently creating the space you were looking for in the first place (and getting your mind off yourself, which is a plus.) It’s the “Christ did not come to serve, but to serve” attitude. Your team won’t always see you the way you want them to, but you providing that will make you love them like Jesus, perpetuating the attitude of service and love. There’s something extremely fulfilling about that, too, which gives you the seenness you were looking for.
* “I love you more than false harmony.”
Jeremy Cearbaugh said that in a session about feedback and I’ve never let it go. Say the thing. Have the conversation. Not saying the thing in the name of “non-conflict” isn’t community, and in fact it destroys it. Leaving it in your spirit breeds resentment and hurt – which destroys the thing you’re trying to protect by keeping it in. Fight for these relationships. I can almost guarantee you that you’ll never have people this willing to fight for it with you again. Jump on it while you have it.
* Take more risks with the Spirit.
I love to ask people that finished the Race what they wish they’d have done more of. The best answer I ever got was from a former squad made who went on to be a squad leader, and this was her answer. I wrote a whole blog about the practicalities of this (you can find it HERE) but this has challenged me more than almost anything else I was told. Let this one sink in. If you feel the itch, DO IT. The worst you can be is wrong, and you didn’t come on this thing to play it safe.
* Seize every freakin moment.
My little brother gave me probs best advice I’ve ever gotten about this thing. He did gap year in 2015 and right before I left he told me: “do the Race and do it hard, cause when you get back you’ll wish you could go back to the Race for your worst day.” I’ve probably thought about this more on the Race than anything else. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve had a tough moment or a hard day and this comes to mind. You might have a couple really bad days on the Race – days you definitely wouldn’t wanna be back for – but that kind of perspective will make you sit in the middle of a bad day and say “you know, maybe this isn’t so bad. I really did wanna be here. It’s kinda crazy that I am. I’d rather have a bad day in South Africa than Marietta, Georgia, right?” That kind of “live with the end in mind” perspective will change your Race and make you seize the moments a little more actively. Believe me, this isn’t an experience you wanna waste
