It was freezing cold in Edmonton on Thursday night, as my buddy and I ran from the theater and jumped into the ice cube, otherwise known as my car. We sat and watched our breath and tried to think warm thoughts.
We started talking, and I said to him, “I am so broken hearted to think that their are people on the streets tonight. I pray there won’t be.”
Here is where God is so faithful to test your heart. We were leaving and their was a man right on the corner. His beard was frosted. His body was shaking. His sign said. “NEED MONEY FOR COFFEE AND A PLACE TO GET WARM” I knew that I could help. I wanted to help. My heart was breaking.
Then the battle in me began. My flesh cried out, “maybe if I don’t look, someone could help him. What if he robs me?” But then we looked at one another. I saw him. Not the lies, the stereo types, just him. He was God’s child, and if he stayed out there, he would freeze to death.
I told my friend we had to turn around, because God was testing us to see if what we pray is what we will practice. How many times have I walked by and tried to tune out the suffering. Sometimes it seems like their is too much need to fill. Sometimes I am just afraid. God is good. Curtis got a warm bed that night. He got the chance to hear about Jesus, he got the chance to make some friends and have a connection to my church. Me I got a chance to see what happens when you allow that perfect love to cast out all fear.
This week God has been stripping me down, breaking my heart and teaching me something very valueable. Here I was preparing to be a missionary, preparing for the ministry… I was learning and growing, but I had stop exercising. I became spirituallly obese. It is not about how much I can know, what fancy new ways I can learn how to pray, and the ABC’s of it all. I am back to where I started. The reason why I signed up. To do the ministry. Not to get fat, but to exercise my faith. I need to be doing the work here and now in my own back yard, before I can be trusted with the whole world.
Praise God! Thank you daddy for showing me your children. That is why I am here. I want to be your hands. Use me, break me, mold me to your image. Curtis, thank you for allowing me to be a part of your life. I love you and I am praying for you where ever you are.
