Oh that? That would be my feet shaking in my boots.. RATTLING in my boots.
Pure nerves over here. I have no idea what I'm getting myself into.
What if my team disowns me because I'm not wearing enough of our team colour?!
What if everyone pairs up and I'm left… alone, in my tent, pretending to sleep while everyone dances around the fire in some kind of bizarre friendship ritual?
What if I'm too Mennonite for this scene?
I'm somewhat worried that I won't connect with my route and my team. It's probably a ridiculous worry, but one that I'm going to nurse nonetheless. And if I ever stop worrying about that I have all of the logistics to occupy that part of my brain gets its kicks from worrying.
What if there's a race to set up my tent and my fingers become all thumbs and I can't make it happen?
What if the airline tells me that my "airporter" is the size of a hockey bag and, no, they can't accomodate that?
At what point do I apparel myself in all red? For the plane ride? Please say that there will be a magical moment when one of the AIM representatives turns to me and says, gently, "You can now begin the transformation process from ordinary girl to member of the M squad." Please say, AIM rep, that that is not above your pay grade.
There's a variety of these sorts of questions that are circulating, and quite frankly perculating, through this fragile mind of mine. I'm trying to just leave it all up to God because he led me in this direction anyway, so he's probably going to have my back once I'm there. He's probably going to meet me there AND THEN SOME. But for now, I'm my own percussion band. Tik-it-tik-it-tik-it-tik-it.
For my squad, I've been sending some prayers to God that we might be so united in our mission and our hearts' desires. I'm incredibly excited to meet all of you and get a better understanding of what exactly it is that we're signing ourselves up for.
Cheers for the journey that is ahead!
