Well…I’m home now. I have been in the States for 6 days and still haven’t gotten over the jet-lag. This is my third time experiencing re-entry into the United States, so I already know what feelings to expect.….the high prices for everything, the comfort (loving it but hating the excess waste but being thankful for what you have and back and forth), remembering that when I speak about what took place, others aren’t always going to understand or agree. Most of all, I just miss being around people that celebrate and honor one another. What gets cultivated overseas on the World Race is really something special. I am thankful for that kind of community.
I miss you F-Squad! I miss you a lot! It hasn’t hit me like others said it would…i.e. crying in the shower, but I do feel a little numb, like something that I really love is missing. Its okay, I have come to terms with seasons coming to an end and transitions being difficult. I guess what I am going through is empty-nest syndrome.
Symptoms of empty nest syndrome include, but are not limited to:
Depression
Loss of purpose
Worry, stress, or anxiety over the welfare of the child
Feelings of rejection
I caught myself being so tired, that I kept putting off spending time with the Lord. I have realized that I can’t cope without spending time with Him everyday. He is my Sustainer, He is my life-line. So I don’t claim that I am experiencing depression, anxiety, or rejection. I feel that I am more comfortable in my skin than I ever have been. God did so much in me while I was gone.
However, I do feel a loss of purpose. I would like to think that I have it all together but I don’t. I know this is a season of rest and being with my family. I know that God has big things waiting just around the corner for me. I just need my heart to catch up with my head. I need to get to a place of contentment in the season the Lord has placed me in right now.
Please pray for me and for Joel. Not sure what he is feeling right now, but I am sure he can use some prayer in this time of transition. Some payer requests are:
- Being able to really rest and enjoy this season.
- For balance between being still and pouring out to those around me.
- Being able to let go of the squad, but still keep in touch with them and being here for them.
- Open doors.
- Provision in full, so I can see the squad in 4 months.
Thank you for the lifting me up. I appreciate it so much!
