I've said it before. I'll say it again [and again and again and again]. And I will probably cry when I walk back through the doors after December 2013.
#ilovemychurch
www.rockharbor.org [ps. @chriskamalski took this photo]
I have been SO blessed to be apart of this community for so many years. I truly believe God had a grand plan when I started going there regularly. I've been stretched, grown, cried, shouted out in joy, made scads of new friends [7PM Crew I am looking at you!] and so many other things while going there. I've fell on my knees before the cross more times then I can count [left side back-corner cross to be exact]. I've had hands laid on my in prayer and I've done the same. I re-discovered my joy in writing and had the realization that yes, I can be a writer because of my participation in the blog. I only have a few more weeks to attend regularly before I move [and praise the Lord..one more 3rd Wednesday]. Then it will be podcasts, reading the blog, and hopefully getting to attend one more time before I launch. And getting the chance to write some devotionals for the wonderful church community next year.
But let's be real. Tonight was no expception to the growth. No exception to walking out being rocked.
We started a new series tonight "I Am". Because when it comes to the vision of the church, it's not about who WE are-it is about who HE is. We went through John 11 talking about Lazarus being brought back to life.
You see, I'm someone with a degree in English [and yes I still make spelling and grammatical errors- and I still ,much to the chagrin of my friends, make up words] but with that degree and all of the classes I took I lived in the land of symbolism, of metaphor and all of the other terminology that is used to tear apart books. And the story of Lazarus…talk about a lovely thing called foreshadowing. So I get it. I get the importance of it.
But Todd Proctor, the lead pastor of RH, made a statement after he read to us how Jesus called Lazarus out of the tomb. He said this:
"Living people don't live in tombs"
let me repeat that:
"Living people DON'T live in tombs"
wow.
Here's the thing: I've been stating through this whole "preparing for the race" portion of the race that God has been refining me. I've been having some not fun things dredged up and I've been having to deal with them. I've getting made stronger in Him.
In reality?
I've been moving from one tomb to the next.
And I haven't been gradually stepping out of them.
God has been coming up and shattering them. Then before I get lost in the rubble; He lights my path. He reminds me He is there.
He shows me why I am letting everything go.
I don't want to live in a tomb anymore.
Jesus brought me to life.
He GAVE me life. So why oh why do I choose to live somewhere where a dead person resides?
I'm slowly walking away from the rubble that are my tombs. I'm being made stronger. And being shown that there are people broken, hurting, in need of love, in need of Jesus who are living in tombs.
I don't have it all figured out yet.
But this process, this pre-race process, is stripping me of everything I know. And helping me start to put on the light of Jesus. It's taking away the death and darkness and showing me that I live in the light of the cross. [sidenote: "live in the light of the cross" is up for 5th tattoo status and no boys of the N SQUAD (you know who you are)–not a "tramp stamp in thailand"]
Dear wonderful heavenly Father,
I thank you for the wisdom you bless others with that they may share it with us. I thank you for the places you have put me in that I have been able to learn and grow and prepare for this race without even knowing it. I pray now that you would continue to show me, to show my squad, what else we need to prepare. Not financially, not physically, but spiritually. I thank you for the ways you have grown us already in this time. Please continue to help us step out of the rubble of the tombs we live in.
Thank you for preparing us for such a time as this. I love you so much my wonderful Savior.
Amen.
[and as a PS–> I am ALMOST to my first deadline that allows me to continue this process. Would you consider partnering with me in this journey? Your support; prayerfully and financially is so needed and so utterly appreciated]
