(I'm not writing this to justify my tattoo to anyone, but to shed light on the meaning of it. A simple command given to all of us.)
A little after 5 pm, on Friday, January 29, 2009 I walked out of my office building thinking, "God where do we go from here? You told me to quit and You would provide. I've worked a month's notice and now I'm unemployed.".
The job I was walking away from was the most stressful job I have ever had. As a result I was on high blood pressure medicine, and was taken to the emergency room straight from work one morning because of my blood pressure. Several friendships came from the job, and I learned a lot while working for this organization. God had made it very clear through prayer, conversations with other people, closing certain doors, and changing my dreams for life that it was time to quit. Many people thought I was crazy. "In this economy you are crazy!! It will take months to find another job." and "I thought you were smarter than this?!? This is the most irresponsible thing you could ever do!"
As I got into my car that day, I felt a happiness that I hadn't felt in a long time. It felt like a 20 ton weight had been lifted from my shoulders even though I had no clue what the future held. For the first time in my life I understood "the peace that passes ALL understanding."
"Ok God, it's just me and You. I'm walking by faith. Completely trusting You."
That weekend I didn't think about being unemployed. On Monday morning when I woke up the Devil and the lies hit like a ton of bricks.
"How could I be so irresponsible?" "What in the heck was I thinking?!? Yeah, it was stressful but I could have kept going."
"Where's my phone?!? Maybe I can get my job back!"
My phone rang.
"We are currently interviewing for a position and wondered if you would be interested?"
I hadnt even applied at this office! I hung up in shock and began getting ready for the interview. "God, I praise you for this!! Please show me if this is what you want for me. Please guide my steps, and help me to think clearly. Unemployment is scary but I want to be in Your will and if that means unemployed then okay."
On Tuesday I started my new job. I am no longer at that job, but God used that season of my life to teach me so many lessons. The biggest one was to completely trust Him. Even though I don't always understand, and I can't see the next step in front of me I am called to walk by faith and not by sight.
My walk of faith has been a chain reaction…
- I quit the first job, started a second one.
- The doors to international missions opened. I lost the second job as a result of my obedience to missions.
- I went to India and served the "untouchables" who God used to touch my life and forever change me.
- Obedience in India opened the doors to where I am today. Serving in Thailand at 3 homes that rescues children from being sold into sex trafficking.
Never in a million years would I have believed one step of faith to resign from my job would bring me to Thailand!!
Every time I look down at my foot it is a reminder of where God has brought me from and how endless the possibilities are for the future if I will continue to walk by faith.
