A Sunday morning just like any other. Alarm goes off at 6:30 only to be delayed by the snooze button for another 30 minutes. My weary mind trying to decide just how long I can sleep in before I absolutely have to get up. Finally, I drag myself downstairs to get ready for the long day that lies ahead. You see Sundays have become a day of business instead of rest. I attend small group before church every Sunday and find myself away from home for most of the afternoon. Most of the time this energizes me and brings great joy to my life. But as of late, this “routine” has become more like a burden. Even saying these words produces a twinge of guilt in my stomach. But, as I have recently pledged to live a more honest life, I have to own up to my pitfalls. This morning may have started similarly to every other of late, but it certainly did not end that way. You see, God had a much different plan in mind for me.
It all started in our group time. This small (or maybe not so small) group of about 20 women has become a place of refuge and courage for me over the past year. It is in this group that I can be totally myself and feel accepted for one of the first times in my life. This place is a home away from home for me. Which is why I had been feeling so disheartened by my lack of excitement and anticipation in going recently. A few weeks ago, we decided to dive back into the Word and chose to study the book of Nehemiah. In all honesty, I think this might have been one of the reasons I was lacking in excitement. I have never read Nehemiah and the first few chapters were proving to be quite boring. I didn’t feel like I was learning anything really. I wanted so much to find meaning and truth in the words on these pages but just wound up feeling frustrated. Why couldn’t we have chosen to do a book packed with truth like Galatians or 1st Corinthians? Now I can learn something from these books (I know I’m sounding a bit like a snob now, but stick with me). So, today I listened to the words of Nehemiah as I read them and prayed that something would resonate with me. As we went into our discussion on Chapters 5 and 6, I was feeling a bit nervous about leading these women I love in a text that I wasn’t sure meant much to me. But, what I found was God illuminating the truth of Nehemiah’s life and his faith in a way that I did not see. I found that this man had an intimacy with God much like the one I so desperately desire. Up to this point, I really thought that I had “gotten there”. I have grown so much in my faith and my walk with Christ, learning more about Him and therefore more about me that I thought I was doing pretty well. Boy, was I wrong.
You see, Nehemiah is following God’s call on his life much like I find myself doing. But, there is a crucial difference in our journeys. This man of old was following God’s plan with a faith that never wavered. He knew that God had called him to this and therefore he trusted with all of his being that God would come through. And this calling wasn’t an easy one by any means. Nehemiah faced persecution, doubt and even threats on his life as he walked forward in God’s plan. But, he never faltered. He asked God for strength or favor when he needed it but he never stopped to see if God was going to come through. He just continued to move forward because he expected God to show up. Wow! I found myself this morning, captivated by this man’s faith. So much so, that I felt the ice around my heart start to melt a bit. Maybe the reason that I was feeling so negative, so bored with my faith was because I had gotten something wrong along the way.
As we walked into the church service together and the band started to play, this melting continued. As I sang words of worship that I had sung countless times before, I felt something new. Something rising up inside of me. As I closed my eyes and lifted my hands, I saw Jesus beckoning me forward, lightly touching my face as he lifts my eyes toward Him and softly says “Follow me Meghan”. My body begins to tingle as a chill rolls up my spine. Tears well up in my eyes as I open myself up to this moment with my Savior. When the worship comes to a close and our pastor approaches the podium, he tells us that today’s message is about becoming stronger in our belief. I mean really! How crazy is that?! The thing that I learn I am lacking most, the thing that God has been revealing to me all morning is what pastor is going to talk about? Praise Jesus!
My heart perks up as our pastor begins his message. He breaks down the word belief into three different categories: essentials, convictions and preferences. Our essentials are the core values that we stand on, our reason(s) for being here on this earth – Christ came, Christ died, Christ rose, Christ appeared and Christ ascended. This is the truth that we are called to stand upon. Our convictions and preferences are unique to each of us. They are the worship songs we like to sing, the pastor that we prefer to receive a message from, our favorite sports team or our political party. They are important to us and so often slowly become the focus of our attention. Rather than our foundation solely being built upon Jesus, we have made some additions. For me, recently it’s looked a little like this: Jesus + the supernatural, Jesus + healing, Jesus + blessings, Jesus + my plan, Jesus + my learning. Now, don’t get me wrong, these “additions” are not in themselves bad. I have added many of these things because God has been opening my eyes to them. BUT, when they are applied as additions to Jesus, He is slowly being diminished. I think this is true of many of us. We cast judgment, even subtly and unintentionally, on those around us, on our church, on our work because of our differing preferences. We focus on what divides us rather than on what unites us. We would rather surround ourselves by the people who think like us than those who challenge us. But what I learned today, what God revealed to me this morning, was that this IS NOT the life that we are called to live!
He has created each of us perfectly and uniquely. Yet, He has offered the same essentials to each of us. Think of it this way. You and your friends are going on a road trip. You are all going to the same place, in the same vehicle, equipped with the same essentials but most likely you will not be packing the same things. Of course each of you will pack food, a pillow and blanket, your toothbrush, etc. But my bet is that even these essentials will look different. Each of you may have a different colored toothbrush. One of your friends has to sleep on a feather pillow, while the other has to have one that’s firm. The food that you need on a road trip includes Twizzlers and Mountain Dew, but your friend only brings water and soy nuts. Your music of choice is Katy Perry, you really love belting out to something you can dance to. Your friend on the other hand, can’t stand pop music and needs some peace and quiet when she drives. Does this mean that the trip is going to be a disaster? Absolutely not. Will it come with some trials at times, oh definitely! But, you can choose to focus on what unites you-your love for each other and the appreciation of time spent together- or the differences that try to tear you apart. Either you will spend the trip laughing and making memories, or pouting and wishing the trip would just be over already. What a shame it would be to miss out on a journey that could push you, teach you and bring you joy to last a lifetime because of some petty differences! It’s the same in our churches, in our workplace, in our relationships and in our lives. Friends, if we choose to continue to focus on our preferences and our convictions rather than the essentials, we’re missing out on the life that God intended us to live. Our foundation is not Jesus + _________. It’s Jesus + NOTHING.
This is the type of belief I want to have. When someone asks me why I’m here, I want my answer to be Jesus. Period. I want to fight my fears, my insecurities and any lies that try to creep in and choose to see what unites us rather than what divides us. I want to celebrate uniqueness and diversity. I want to look for opportunities to be around those who are different from me rather than shy away from them because of comfort. I want to seek to learn about other people-their lives, their backgrounds, their culture and their convictions- with anticipation and acceptance rather than judgment. Because the truth is, none of those differences really matter. I don’t know the work that Jesus is doing in their lives; the intimate secrets that their share with Him. And I don’t need to. When the focus of my life is Jesus + nothing, I am made free to love everyone that crosses my path.
And this lesson, this revelation from my God couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. As I prepare to leave all that I know behind, it is essential that I rest in this truth as much as possible. What will become my new family, are people who undoubtedly have different convictions and preferences than me. Our journeys up to this point will be as different as day and night. We have all been created uniquely, but our essentials have led us here. We will be spending every hour of every day together in countries and cultures that are completely foreign to us. Frankly, this could be a recipe for disaster if I, if we don’t choose to focus on what unites us.
So I end this blog, as I so often do, with a choice. Starting today, I will choose to build my foundation on Jesus alone. And I understand fully that this will not be the only day that I make this choice. I will continue to choose to focus on Him and only Him every single day for the rest of my life. I will choose to see the essentials that unite us rather than the differences that divide us. My life will be a reflection of Jesus + NOTHING!
