So…my blogs have taken a delay again, sorry about that. I have to be honest we went
from no internet in China to internet everywhere here in Thailand (even in my bed)! It was great to have it but it was overwhelming and quite distracting. Ten months with limited internet to fully accessible internet, yes, culture shock :). So, I took a little hiatus, or fast, from
internet for a while. BUT, I’m back and back to posting! So have no fear you have much to read! 🙂 Much to catch up on.
CHINA….let’s start there.
What happened in China?
Well for the most part what happened
in China stays in China. 🙂
In order to protect our contacts and friends I won’t be going into much detail.
If I do, know they are made up names and locations so don’t try and google for
more.
What I CAN tell you is that our month there was absolutely
wonderful! We had the opportunity to live life with one another and truly begin
to put into practice all that we have learned throughout the race (you can see
pics and more on China Update blog to come).
At the beginning of the month I was reminded I have a CHOICE.
I CHOOSE what my life looks like.
I CHOOSE who I love.
I CHOOSE who I serve.
I have a choice.
And if I’m honest I didn’t choose so well at first.
This marked 6 months since we had been Abundant LIFE and I
came to realize that you can live with people for 6 months, but its at this
time that you really have to make the choice to live with them and love them
well. They are different than me. They don’t all operate the same. They don’t’
always agree with me. They don’t think the same.
I was met with a choice.
Who do I serve? Do I love them well or do I just live with them for the next few months?
For the first few days, I served myself. I didn’t’ have a
servants heart. I was struggling. I didn’t want to serve “them.� It was the
first time I saw myself separating from my team, my family. I loved who I
wanted to and lived how I wanted to. But my life has been community for the
past 8 months how long do you really think I could have lasted living like that? Right… not
long. I became discontent seeing the errors and ugliness in my ways. I saw
how selfish I was being and I was reminded,
I didn’t do anything to deserve God’s love.
He freely gave it to me and
continues to do so every day.
So who am I to decide who gets MY love?
If I have the heart of the Father — which I had been praying
for — then my love would be overflowing and seeping on to others and into all
my actions. But that brings us to the other ugly in terms of my selfish heart. I was serving myself, not the Lord and His mission.
I had a CHOICE.
I have a choice every morning, every moment.
Who am I going to serve?
Am I going to serve myself or am I going to serve the Lord?
Whose mission do I put first?
Who do I trust more?
Ouch! My ugliness was in my face. I was being selfish
not only hoarding my love but I also wasn’t trusting the Lord for His goodness. So….I stayed
up until 4am talking with Him, praying asking forgiveness and reconnecting with
my Papa. (I love late nights with God, it actually became a norm in China, the
stillness and quiet…yes please!)
The next morning I then humbly went to my team
and asked for their forgiveness as well. I shared my heart and the work God had been
doing.I shared my ugly and asked for their help and prayers.
And honestly, God showed up and overflowed from my heart in
ways I never expected.
“As I fill you with My Love, you become a reservoir of
love, overflowing into the lives of other people.”
This was true. He filled me with His abundant love and grace. It overflowed.
I chose
to LOVE my team and the love increased every day. I cherished the FUN we had this month! The steamrolling, playing in the snow,
(photo by Christy Zyblut)
making bean pancakes,
riding bikes around the city, eating banana chips, watching movies, spraying crisco in hair (take your guess),
(photo by Christy Zyblut)
and just living as friends…well family….
(photo by Christy Zyblut)
These women are my family. They have taught me, loved me, and pushed me to the Lord.
At 6 months…..I CHOOSE LOVE.
