So it seems like everywhere I turn these days…..marriage. is. everywhere.
Maybe I'm just noticing it more than I usually do, or maybe God is just getting a big laugh out of it. Either way, He has been preparing me in crazy ways, and by crazy, I mean extremely unpleasant. He has been showing me my major points of weakness, breaking down all of my walls, and peeling all the calluses off of my heart created by past relationships. I'm not going to lie, it has been ridiculously painful and I have not enjoyed it one bit, but somewhow, He always brings me right back to Himself and His truth. So, at the end of each day, I've been able to smile about the things He's been teaching me and laugh about my prior foolishness.
If I've learned one thing, it's this:
the lies the enemy feeds us are totally absurd.
He has tricked me into believing things for 22 years that are completely inaccurate and are just the opposite of what God has to say about me and about all of us who are His children. Satan tells us we're never good enough, pretty/handsome enough, smart enough, perfect enough, we have to compete with everyone else to be the best, and we'll never measure up to the expectations set for us. Believing these things has caused serious problems for me and my relationships in the past, and over the past month or so, I've come to realize just how much of an impact they've had on how I've viewed myself and others. But redemption is a beautiful thing…because the God of the universe tells us we are perfect, holy, and blameless in His sight through Jesus Christ. He says we are beautiful, forgiven, and loved. He loves us. And if the God who created all things and is perfect in every way says this about us, His word and truths far exceed any of the lies we may be told by the enemy.
Truly believing what the Lord says about me, taking every lie from Satan captive, and allowing God to destroy them is a continuing process that will probably take years. But how I let them affect my relationships with others is something I can see actively changing for the better. Don't get me wrong, it has been really difficult, and there have been times where I've had to totally separate myself from people because the lies were getting too heavy to carry; that way I could just have some time with my Jesus and let Him scoop me up and remind me of His truths. But the changes, even just in my level of awareness and need for renewal, have been great enough to cause ripple effects in my heart.
I know He is using this time prior to the World Race to prepare me for the things I'll encounter and experience while I'm gone, but I also think He is preparing me for what will happen beyond that in my future marriage. Thanks to the Lord and a wonderful series on marriage at my church, I'm realizing the importance of my walk with the Lord in all of my relationships, my role as a woman and a member of Christ's church, what it looks like to be transformed into the Proverbs 31 woman, how to be submissive and responsive, what it looks like to not hesitate, and how to fully TRUST God ((further confirming why He was so set on trust being My One Word for 2011)). I've learned that marriage is lived by grace and it is NOT about my happiness. Its ultimate purposes are to spread the Gospel by making sure that my children's children know Christ, and to be a reflection of Christ and His love for the church.
My prayer is that the Lord would continue to mold me into a godly woman, friend, and wife. That He would help me to continue to trust in Him so that I will be able to give myself fully and freely to my spouse. Continue to shape my future husband's heart into a reflection of Christ's; show him what living for Christ truly looks like, and give him a godly vision for our marriage. Protect his eyes and protect my heart. I pray for a marriage that seeks only to bring glory to His name in every aspect of our life together, and that our children's children will know and walk with the Lord all the days of their lives.
I'm praying this prayer without ceasing, and I know He will be faithful to provide!
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life….
She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. ~Proverbs 31:10-12, 25-30
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
~Ephesians 5:21-33
