This month has been all about the tough questions for me.
Whether it’s me asking God questions about these kid’s lives
Or me asking other people questions
Or people asking me the tough questions.
I’m not really a dreamer.
I don’t dream up crazy, extravagant plans.
I don’t really dream about the future
Or being one of those people who dream to change the world in drastic ways.
I am a very surface level person.
I don’t think analytically.
I forget about things once they happen.
I’ve just never been a creative person or dreamer.
So it’s no surprise that when asked the tough questions I honestly have no answer.
A wonderful squadmmate of mine asked me one day
“What is your deepest desire?”
I’m sure my facial expression was priceless.
Come again.
My deepest desire?
How did she even want me to answer that?
What was she looking for?
I have no clue what a deep desire of mine is.
So there is question number one that got my brain working.
And then came question number two in feedback one night.
“What makes your heart burn?”
Well I can think of things that I really enjoy.
I can even give an answer out loud.
As a matter of fact I did answer that question.
But as I thought about it
I don’t know that’s it’s something that just makes my heart burn.
It’s something I care about a whole lot.
But does it make my heart really burn?
I don’t think so.
So then what is my deepest desire?
What does my heart truly burn for?
As these questions are asked the fact that I’m not a dreamer keeps being pointed out to me.
But I want to have big dreams.
So I’ve decided I’m going to make out a list of crazy dreams.
I’m going to put my brain into action and think of things that seem unthinkable.
I’m going to have faith that my plans are in accordance to God’s
And he will bring them to full fruition.
Maybe though instead of big dreams
I’ll have small ones and watch God turn them into something huge.
I’ll watch as he blows my mind with bringing them into actuality.
I’m going to be a dreamer.
I’m going to have answers for the questions.
