These past few years have been a roller coaster of a ride. I’ve been in and out of school, trying to follow what I always assumed was the path I was suppose to. I never really put much thought in to why it didn’t seem quite right, until I had finished 4 years of college (no where close to a degree) and wanted to call it quits.
I had messed up the formula somehow. Four years and then your out, right? What happened?
My fifth year became a year of anger, bitterness, and ultimately loneliness. I dropped out of school that first semester (Fall 2011), thinking I would take time to “figure things out.” When it didn’t come that semester, I took another one off.
I was standing completely still, while I watched my friends move on to new and exciting phases of their lifes (graduation, marriage, moving to new cities, getting “big girl” jobs). I was so confused as to why God seemed to be blessing them with these joyful moments, but I seemed to be walking through the darkest valley of life He had ever allowed. Little did I know the joy He was indeed preparing for me!
I was nearing on a year of being out of school, when the Lord prompted me to apply for “Fall Program” through a ministry called Discipleship Focus in Pigeon Forge, TN. This idea was crazy! It meant I was about to up and leave my comfort zone in Chattanooga for 4 months to live with these people…
That fall (2012) ended up being the most renewing time of my life. The Lord met me right where I was at, in the mitts of brokenness that I had grown completely numb to. He provided an absolutely amazing community of brothers and sisters in Christ. And reminded me that His love is unfailing and unconditional. He didn’t care that I didn’t have a plan for my life because he had one in store. That fall He reminded me “Not all who wander are lost.” And so, that has become my mantra.
That fall the Lord also brought up the idea of the World Race. I started the application, but kept the thought tucked away as I tried to figure out where I was going to go once Fall Program ended. I was definitely being called away from Chatttanooga, but I was denying any indication that I should just go home to Cookeville.
So naturally, guess where the Lord wanted me?
Ding! Ding! Ding! Cookeville, TN!!!
God totally has a sense of humor. The one place I fought going for so long, ended up being just what I needed. He opened the doorway for me to go back to school at Tennessee Tech (and graduate in one year) and provided a wonderful community of believers! God is good!
This past summer (2013) I had the opportunity to serve as a leader for Discipleship Focus’s Summer Program. During that time He taught me the importance of obedience through 7 beautiful women that I was blessed to disciple in a small group.
These girls brought me so much joy, but I’m not going to lie…Leading was hard! I was constantly questioning if I was doing it right and if my girls were understanding what I wanted them to. However, the Lord reminded me that He was in control of each of their lives. He didn’t need me in His ministry, BUT He was calling me to be a part of it. I had the choice to be obedient to the best of my ability or stress over every detail. Again… He used this as a HUGE time of preparation.
When I got back from the summer He began to place the World Race back on my heart. I picked up my application where I had left it almost a year ago, and nervously pressed “submit.” About a month later I was officially accepted for the July Route of 2014!
I will graduate from college next month, and as I embark on a new journey I realize all He wants me to do is trust Him, following His voice wherever He calls me! This song by Hillsong UNITED really embodies how I feel the Lord is calling me to live my life: Oceans. I hope you’re inspired by it as much as I am.
I invite you to walk alongside me in this amazing adventure! I can’t wait to share with you what the Lord is doing and is going to do!
