Yet Again, Change is on the Way
Today as I was cleaning my apartment and I got to thinking it’s already June. Really? I only have until next month before I move back in with my parents until I depart on the World Race. Really? This can’t be right. I fill as if I just moved out a couple of months ago but yet it’s been a year now. Really? As you can tell by all the “really”, I’m sort of in disbelief with how the time has gone by. A part of me is sad as I think about this short chapter coming to an end but then again, as I think about all of the positive change that took place over the past year and what more will come by this time next year, I realize that this was just a step into what God was going to reveal to me next as I was learning to depend on Him, growing spiritually, and building relationships.
Last year, God began to pour into me as I sought Him more than I ever had before. My relationship with Christ became something more than just the way I was raised. It became personal. It no longer felt like something I had to do. I didn’t want someone’s opinion on what Christianity should look like, but instead, I wanted to know what it was all about for myself. Then, God began to test just how much I wanted this because total surrender to Christ comes leaps of faith. "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." (Hebrews 11: 6)
The first leap of faith was His calling on my life to another church. This took quite a while of going back in forth with God. I mean, why would God call me to go to a different church than my family, leaving my church family of eight years??? I was comfortable there and knew lots of people. So in a worldly sense it just didn’t make much sense. Especially with the love I had for this church and the impact it had made on my life throughout my youth years. Through much seeking and praying, God left me with no choice. I became miserable ignoring God’s calling and He became so clear in revealing this to me. The next step was the hardest step I was going to have to make up to that point in my life.
I was faithful to Gods calling into another church. So I was like, okay God, that wasn’t so bad. He quickly showed me that that wasn’t it. That He was going to require so much more Faith from me than He has ever required me to have before. I was going to have to have full dependence on God. God was calling me to move out of my home. I was instantly like, hold up! I’m not trying to grow up and get out right now! I can’t afford this and I just simply don’t want to leave home. So like before, I tried to ignore it. But it just continued to come up. Then one night, as I was on my way home from church, God put it on my heart to start putting back $50 a week from each paycheck. I had no idea why He would want me to do that but I said ok Lord, have your way and reveal to me why You want me to do this. Shortly after getting home my buddy sent me a text saying, “I feel like me and you should seriously start praying about possibly finding a place to rent”. I began to get a nervous stomach because I knew that was the answer that I had just asked for. To be sure that this was what God wanted me to do I really had to seek and pray. It was probably the hardest experience of growing up and stepping out in faith thus far. In a logical sense, this decision didn’t make sense and seemed a tad be stupid considering I would only be moving 15 minutes away.
I have skipped a lot of details and things God showed me throughout the past year and a half but what I want you to understand about my journey up to now is that basically, through each of these steps I realized that God had a specific reason for each one. Each step led to another, preparing me for an even greater plan for my life. Each step was required to reach the next and so on. I learned that sometimes faith requires going even when we don’t know when, how, or why. In Jeremiah 18 the Lord told Jeremiah, “Go down to the potter’s house, and there I will give you my message.” He had to go in faith not knowing why and what exactly God was going to reveal to him. Also in Genesis 12:1, God says to Abram, "Go from your country, your people and your father's household to the land I will show you.” God’s calling doesn’t always have a logical explanation. God is much bigger than our human logic can grasp! For Jeremiah and Abram to find out what God was trying to show them, they had to first go in faith. He didn’t lay it all out in front of them then ask them to leave. My mind can’t grasp and even begin to fully imagine what God is calling me to now by going on the World Race.
It’s awesome to look back and see how God has used each of these steps to get me to the place and calling I’m at now and the man He has and continues to mold me into. It’s even more awesome knowing that this is just another step and that by continuing on the path of righteousness, even greater will come and so on! I have definitely questioned and doubted this one. It is very overwhelming to think about that yet again, change is on the way and just what that change does and might require. I just got comfortable! But it’s not about my comfort. Then again, It’s not about me at all. If it were, I would stay put…. I can’t help to question it though… Really God? $15,500?? 11 months of giving up everything??
This step is definitely going to exceed any other so far. However, I know that God is all-powerful and much bigger than any obstacle. Where there is His will, there is a way!
“He leads me in the paths of righteousness 
for His name’s sake.”
