Nepal was the culmination of many years of growth. In Bulgaria, I started to see how little I actually trusted God with my life. In India, the Lord gave me an unquenchable thirst for the Word. In Nepal, He started unlocking a vision for my life that involves discipling and mentoring young men.
This journey has been a journey about learning to trust God. And learning to trust God, I think, requires learning to stop relying on yourself so much. It means radical change at our core. Most of us don’t like change of any kind, much less surgery on our core self. It will hurt, might bring us to our knees, and can even make us scream with pain. But God is worth trusting. He loves us more than we can ever know. His wounding seems crushing, but it will always restore us to wholeness. If you find yourself on his operating table, be still and learn to trust him.
I am leaving Nepal a better man. I am leaving with deeper faith. I am leaving with a lifetime of joyful memories. Most importantly, I am leaving empty. I gave away all that I could in the relationships I had here.
As you celebrate the new year, think about endings and beginnings, the old and the new, what is past and what is ahead. Often times there is a sort of tension in the uncertainty. Without uncertainty, there is no need for faith. For those of us who believe in Jesus, the Spirit whispers … “I am the Prince of Peace, and I am alive in you. Because of me, you have hope.”
“Rejoice in hope. Be patient in tribulation. Be constant in prayer.” Romans 12:12
