“The LORD is my light and my salvation– whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life– of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident.” Psalm 27:1
So my squad was at a mall in Tegucigalpa when I realized that I was having, well let’s say, my first regular digestive system process, since being here in Honduras.
So I run to the bathroom with a teammate. When I get in the stall, I realize, I’m going to be there a while, so I tell her to go to the store she wanted across the hall.
I do my thing for a while, then that moment of terror runs through my body.
There is no toilet paper.
I go a solid minute convinced that I am going to have go get toilet paper myself, and I was thinking about all the repercussions if I got up to go get it.
Then the Lord blessed my memory and I remembered that I have a Spanish translation book in my backpack.
I quickly look up toilet paper in the book.
And in the most needy, desperate voice you can imagine, I yell,
“NECESITO PAPEL HIGIÉNICO, POR FAVOR, POR FAVOR!”
(I NEED TOILET PAPER, PLEASE! PLEASE! For you non-Spanish speakers.)
I hear a few teenage girls giggle and finally I get my toilet paper and I say, “gracias” with more enthusiasm than I can express.
When I come out, I see that you’re supposed to get the toilet paper outside the stall before you go in to do your thing.
Silly me.
This analogy is going to have a few flaws and is a little bit of a stretch, so your grace is appreciated.
So at the end of the day I was thinking about that funny experience, when I realized it was kind of like my World Race experience so far.
I rushed into this thing in many aspects.
I was so focused on the excitement factor, I was focused on the serving factor, I was focused on the relationship building.
I hadn’t totally prepared for the drastic change that God was going to do in my life, and in my walk with him.
Honestly, there’s nothing that can prepare you for the drastic change that’s ahead.
I’m grateful that when I reached that moment that I realized that I was stuck, there was someone there to hand me toilet paper.
In World Race culture, they call this calling greatness out of each other. I had reached a point where I needed to go deeper with the Father, I wanted to, but I just didn’t know how to get passed that seemingly locked door.
My team leader took me aside that night to look at the amazingly clear Honduran sky on the prayer wall. I promise you, God gave that girl keys to unlock that door for me.
We identified that the thing holding me back was fear.
We declared that those chains of fear be gone.
She spoke incredible life into me and over me.
She painted this beautiful picture of heaven where there were kids running around, playing, and just having fun. No hurt, no pain. There was no fear, because there was this incredible safety net surrounding them.
Pray for me to walk in childlike faith, and to live in confidence of the promises God has made.
I know, and am so grateful that when I cry out in the most desperate of times, that there will always be someone to hand me toilet paper.
