Our team is currently in Ban Doi, Thailand, where we previously lived in December. This ministry assignment initially came as quite a shock/disappointment to us.
Instead of explaining the situation it in detail, I wrote a poem.
Mourning a Death
He bows
gasping
begging
hands folded in desperation
Lord, if it is Your will
remove this cup
Your will
my will clouds my mind
and now it’s me in
Gethsemane
hoping
pleading
let me not return
to that place
it cannot possibly be
Your will
pride
inside me
blinding my vision
from the bigger picture
where no tongue speaks our language
where no heart knows the Lord by name
is where our feet will be
He whispers
“walk with me into the desert
away from your desires
away from your will”
the five stages of grief are
denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance
surrender is sixth
my will offered at His feet
still bodies
we are vessels
Almighty moving
with His hand
Spirit rustles
orphan hearts
a mystery to me
no fruit
no results
to the naked eye
our presence is a seed
Adonai
reap this harvest
I carry this cross
resting in confidence
patiently waiting
no sight of this mighty tree
on earth
but heaven awaits
with a towering forest
dirty squatty
snotty nose
His glory
preposition lesson
physically drained
His glory
light burden
easy yoke
lifted weight
His glory alone
truck bed riding
tears on cheek
mourning the death
of my fleshly desires
He wept in the garden
knowing in three days
the stone would be rolled away
this Resurrection will be beautiful
