The theme of the past two months, for me, seemed to be overcoming insecurities, feelings of inadequacy, and comparison….fun stuff!
Has anyone ever told you that they thought you were incapable of doing something? In response, did you make an internal vow that you would prove them wrong by succeeding at that very thing? Was proving them wrong your motivation for accomplishment? Great fuel for success, right? Wrong, that my friend, is the evidence of insecurity, rooted in fear.
From nursing, to public speaking, to missions, I’ve been told by many that, “This isn’t something that I can see you doing.” Initially I second guessed my choices, and in all honesty, was a little offended. Then, I became driven to “succeed” in order to prove them wrong. The problem with this was that my focus and sense of purpose became rooted in other people, and my motives were all messed up. In reality, though I was driven and seemingly confident, my exaltation of the opinions of others lead to me carrying a burden that I was never meant to carry and that could never be satisfied.
Upon reflection of my motives, the Lord reminded me of His truth.
He reminded me that I was not created to please man, but God (Galatians 1:10) and that I am to live my life before Him, as an audience of One. I am to exalt His opinion, and His thoughts concerning me above those of myself or anyone else. And the good news here is that they are good!
He reminded me that He uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise (1 Corinthians 1:27). It doesn’t matter what other people do or do not see in you, because God’s plan is irrespective and independent of their sight, vision, or opinion. In fact, He often uses people and circumstances that don’t seem to make sense to others in order to make a statement. He called Moses, who had a speech problem, to stand before royalty and deliver a nation from slavery. He used David, a young shepherd boy, to empower an entire army to be bold and courageous by overthrowing an enemy that caused them to cower in fear. He anointed the young shepherd boy as the king of Israel, through whose lineage a King would forever reign. He used Rahab, a prostitute, to protect two Israelite spies, exemplifying faithfulness. He used Paul to be a zealous and effective witness for Jesus, when before, he zealously persecuted followers of Christ…and the list goes on.
My mission in life is not to prove that I, in and of myself, am or am not anything to anyone. But it is to represent Christ in the Earth, to be salt and light, from the position of a life surrendered to Jesus. In doing so, the focus is taken off of myself, and an enormous weight is lifted. As my heart, my focus, and my affections are set on Christ, His Kingdom, and His righteousness – everything else falls into place. What truly matters, and what I should truly be passionate about becomes evident and clear.
“And this passion does not bow to what anyone else thinks.”
I am currently $1,249 away from my first financial deadline of $5,000, which is in May….2 months away…time is flying! Would you consider partnering with me, by supporting me financially and/or in prayer, on this journey to share the love of Jesus in some of the most unreached nations in the world?
Thank you to each of you who have supported and partnered with me thus far!!!
