I know this is the part where I’m supposed to tell you that I always dreamed of being a missionary.
I know this is the part where most people expect a confession on how my heart has always belonged to the nations and telling them about Jesus.
I know this is the part where you expect me to tell you that as soon as I heard about the World Race I was committed to it.
I know if I told you all of the above, I would be lying. So, I won’t tell you. Instead, I’ll tell you what really happened:
Sometime in either late fall or early winter of 2012, my college girls Bible study had a guest come share her testimony and tell us about her life of missions. She had been in that same Bible study when she was a college student, so it was like welcoming a long-lost sister we had never known back home. She was so passionate and enthusiastic about traveling around this world telling people about Jesus and simply being the loving Christian woman that God made her to be. Her name was Lindsey Little.
You probably are thinking she was a World Racer, right? Well, she wasn’t. In fact, amidst her photos and stories from the mission field, she briefly made a side comment about a friend of hers that had gone on The World Race. But for some reason (we can all agree now, it was the hand of Abba Father), that side comment is what made its way into my notebook for further research later.
Fast-forward to around February 2013: I had extensively researched the World Race and it was steadily becoming a large portion of my thoughts. I was due to graduate college in May and my carefully laid out plans were to then go to law school. I had taken the LSAT (twice), scored well enough to get scholarships, and had applied to many law schools across the country. I was on track for MY plan. The thing is, I just couldn’t get the World Race out of my mind.
So, I applied to the World Race. I had my interview, and….I was accepted for a September 2013 route! As excited as I was, I was also equally terrified. But what about MY plan to go to law school? What about all the people counting on me to go? What was I suppose to do?
I prayed about it. A lot. I had my Bible study girls and leader praying about it. I had my Momma praying about it. But the thing about prayer is you have to actually listen to the response. It does no good to ask God to give an answer if we just go around ignoring it.
I accepted my spot on the Race, but then I rescinded the acceptance after more and more law school acceptance letters and scholarship offers filled my mailbox. I kept telling myself, “God put a passion in me for justice and an ability to understand law and court cases. As long as I make sure to be a ‘good’ lawyer, God will be okay with that.” No. Take it from me — trying to justify going against God’s calling is NEVER a good idea. Just don’t do it.
June 2013 I went with a friend of mine from college to the town that our law school is in and we signed leases for an apartment. I sent in all my paperwork to the law school. I paid my deposit. I accepted my scholarship. I was set for law school. And, for a little while, I was really excited about it.
Until I really thought about it. Until I really asked God if that was His plan for me. Until I asked God to make me see His plan. Until late July. Late July was when my journal started filling up with “I’m not so sure law school is where I should be right now” entries. Late July was when I realized my heart was no longer completely into going to law school like it used to be. Late July was probably the most internally conflicting time of my life. Law school v. missions. I wouldn’t take that time back for anything. I grew in my faith more in those days than I had in months.
In August I still moved to my new apartment over 4 hours away from my home, my family, and where I really wanted to be. In August I went to law school. In August I was accepted into the World Race – July 2014 Route 2. In August I withdrew from law school. In August I said “yes” to God’s plan over my own. In August I finally, finally, FINALLY took that big step of faith that God kept asking me to take.
I never expected God to call me to be an overseas missionary. In fact, I never thought that I was “missionary material.” I mean, I like hot showers, hand sanitizer, and certainty. But, the amazing thing is, I love God more. I love those people He is sending me to more. I love that He is allowing me to be used for His glory. I love feeling the peace that comes with being in the middle of His Will. I love being obedient to Abba Father. I love that God’s plan is greater than my plan. I love that He has looked at the depths of my heart and has called me to be a World Racer.
The thing about God is, He isn’t limited by what we ask or imagine. He’s bigger than that. He’s better than that.
The Bible tells us in Ephesians 3:20-21: “Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think — according to the power that works in you — to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
Amen! He took my pleas for law school acceptances and gave me something even better: an opportunity to go on the World Race. I love that about Abba Father. He is always surprising His children with bigger and better adventures than we think is possible for ourselves. We just have to say “yes.”
And you can find me saying…..”Yes Lord, Yes!”
