Let me start by saying that this blog is just the beginning. Training Camp was life-altering, earth-shattering, soul-changing. I can’t even begin to write about my team (Wimbi) or my squad (UUUU!) because they’ve already begun changing me in ways I can’t quite comprehend yet. It’s funny, you know? Because something as physically, emotionally, and spiritually taxing as Training Camp requires tons of processing. But it’s almost like it requires so much processing that you’re never really sure if or when you’re done.
Are you ever really “done” learning from something like Training Camp? (lol as if there’s anything else like TC) Or does it—all its questions, answers, and lessons—simply become a part of you? I’ve had trouble this week trying to chronical my thoughts in a way that would make sense to anyone who wasn’t living in my brain, but here’s my best attempt at conveying what I learned in the 10 days that changed me, redeemed me, and transformed me.
11 Things I Learned at Training Camp (I had to)
- If you don’t share the little things (like peanut butter and baby wipes), you won’t share the big things (like love, your heart, and the Gospel.)
- Physical limits are nothing more than mental limits; you can always push harder.
- The length of time you’ve had a relationship with someone is irrelevant. Sometimes the closest friendships are the ones you form in 10 days.
- Personal hygiene is subjective.
- Sacrifice is worth it. Seriously. Sacrificing sleep for warmth and good conversation? Worth it. Sacrificing bucket showers for power naps? Totally worth it. *see #4* Sacrificing a year of friends, family, and worldly comforts for vulnerability, discipleship, and adventure? Yeah, I have a feeling it’ll be worth it.
- The best parties are dance parties and there’s never a bad time to throw one.
- Not all coffee is created equal.
- Ear plugs are one of many ways God shows us He loves us.
- Being bored with a group of people is significantly less boring than being bored with a smartphone.
- Baby powder saves lives. *read: thighs*
- Camelbaks are not- I repeat not- World Race-proof
In the 10 days I spent in Georgia, I saw a new side of God and I saw a new side of myself. I heard Him speak to me for the first time—and the second, and the third… I heard His truth when I was praying in the moonlight atop a hill at midnight. I heard His truth from speakers, from friends, and even from strangers. Here’s another list (you’re welcome) of…
11 things God Told Me at Training Camp
- Who you are is not who you have been being.
- I am not finished with you yet.
- I’ve scattered pieces of your heart around the world; now is your time to go and find them.
- You are a powerhouse of a woman; it may intimidate them, but it doesn’t intimidate me.
- I am and have been pursuing your heart. You are my beloved, my bride.
- You are more than just the funny one.
- Where you go, I go. I am within you.
- There is no part of you I cannot use.
- There’s so much more to me, waiting to be discovered by you.
- You are redeemed.
- I have not made you to be a lightweight anything; I have made you to be bold in all that you do.
Training Camp was, in a word, transformative. While there, someone said “everyone has a beginning” and I know that this is mine. Who I’ve been being is not who I am. What I’ve done is irrelevant—it is forgiven. I am worthy, I am redeemed, I am loved beyond compare. For the first time, I say these things with confidence; I say them knowing they are true.
In those 10 days, I felt the Holy Spirit come into me for the first time. I surrendered myself and my life completely to God for the first time. Training Camp was the first time I pulled an all-nighter and lived to tell the story. It was the first time I went 10 days sans makeup, showered with a paint bucket and a measuring cup, turned my phone off and forgot all about it, and the first time I believed what others’ said about me. Transformative.
I’ll close with a story. One day at TC, we were given a set of questions to ask God. I sat, reading my Bible, and came to the last question. “God, what is one thing you really like about me?” I tried to sit and wait for an answer, but I really had to pee. So I snuck out of the room, wondering what God could possibly like about me. For years, I’ve struggled with being “the funny one.” I saw myself as lacking physical beauty and needing to make up for it with a good sense of humor.
Lately, I’ve been ashamed of that humorous side of me. I’ve felt as though my only worth lies in my ability to make people laugh. I constantly compare myself to other girls—girls who are soft-spoken and beautiful and always seem to get the guy. So I started wondering if maybe I, too, should become soft-spoken. Maybe if I stop being so loud, people will like me more. Maybe if I quiet my presence, guys will be more attracted to me.
So there I am, doing my business, and when I pull up my pants, I realize there’s a long strip of toilet paper tucked into the back of them and I just bust out laughing. I imagine myself walking back into the training center in front of 150 people with a tail of TP and I knew, right there in the port-a-potty, that God was telling me to embrace my sense of humor. “I LOVE that you’re funny!” He kept repeating.
God has not created me quiet. He has not created me soft-spoken or lightweight. He has created me BOLD. He has created me loud, strong, and unafraid. He loves about me my sense of humor and He loves about me my loud joy. I am enough for Him. And if that’s so, then no one—including myself—gets to decide that I’m not enough for anyone else.
Thanks, TC, for showing me a new side of Christ and a new side of me.
