When I see how God is at work, my enthusiasm builds, the passion deep inside of me ignites from “sparks”. Have you ever felt like your sense of purpose has faded away into the background of everything else taking over your life? But then one day, you have an experience, a conversation, a revelation that awakened your spirit and gave you a little jolt? You saw something happen, read an article or a book, or had a conversation with someone and some truth resonated with something deep down in your gut. You wanted to see something change, or to share that truth with another person, you wanted to be part of the bigger picture. When was the last time something set off a spark?!
On our first or second day at John’s house, he mentioned his hope that there would be at least one person who would prayerfully consider coming back to Romania to serve as a missionary/ESL teacher/children’s leader here in Viile Tecii for at least one year. When someone presents a challenge like that…when they’re looking for just one…something sparks in me. I’m eager to be that “just one”. I have to be careful though. God is in the process of teaching me to be satisfied fully in Him. Pursuing intimacy in my relationship with God is to be my “first thing” and the ministry a “second thing”. (Check out The PAPA Prayer by Larry Crabb.) I really need to pull away from selfish desires of getting attention, for trying to play the role of a martyr. I’m practicing discernment and seriously considering this call for a teacher in Romania.
On Sunday, a group of us went to help lead a church service in Tonciu, which is about a 30 minute drive from Viile Tecii. God had given me a word for the people, but I hesitated to speak up. When John mentioned that Sandu would be going back on Tuesday night to hold a Bible study, I felt a “spark” and I jumped at the chance to see what this spark would ignite. Then I was assigned the task of leading the Bible study. That terrified me. My mind immediately went blank and I began to think that I was incapable. I kept putting pressure on myself to come up with something profound for the people to learn. I wanted to hide, but God reminded me that this was right; I knew God wanted me to do this and so I trusted.
After some really honest prayer and surrender, God was quick to show me what to teach at the Bible study. I shared this with the others who would be coming and together we put a lesson together. I went there expecting a Bible study like I was used to in the States. (And to be frank, I only expected 5 people to show up.) The Bible study was more or less, me having to stand up in front of about 20 people teaching a mini-sermon with my teammates. I was so nervous and it was somewhat difficult working with a guy who was learning to translate. I was just a rookie. But by the end of the night, I saw that people were actually “getting it”. I knew God was in our midst and bringing revelation to their hearts and minds. It wasn’t because of the way our group was teaching. It was ALL God. But I felt so privileged to be the vessel, to be the one He chose to lead and teach!
On the drive home, I was intrigued about Sandu’s work as a travelling pastor among the many villages. I didn’t realize the great need for teachers, Bibles, leaders, mentors, etc. The sparks just kept igniting. I was continually reminded of Matthew 9:35-38 where Jesus is teaching, preaching and healing in many towns and villages. His compassion pours out to them because they are as helpless as sheep without a shepherd. He tells his disciples in verse 38, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest [the people], therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” The people in Tonciu, Viile Tecii, Lechinta and many villages here are hungry for more of God’s Word, to hear more, to have their questions answered. This harvest field is ready, but the laborers are few and need support.
I’m praying daily for guidance, whether it’s for me or someone reading this blog. Regardless, remember what I asked you…when was the last time something set off that spark in you? It can be painful to ignore it. Do you feel like your spirit needs a jolt to bring you back to life? Please hear me in this…the pursuit of sparks will not satisfy you enough. I beg of you to take this cry to God. The closer you become to God, the more frequent and powerful those sparks will become. It’s exciting to be the vessels, and the opportunities about to be such vessels. Your purpose comes only from God. Seek Him out with all your heart, soul, mind and strength…and soon enough…sparks are gonna fly!!!
